#1. A Well-trained Tongue-Focus on her entirely
It may sound like less of a fantasy and more of a sex tip, but a lot of women want their men to focus on their entire bodies. "I want him to lick and kiss everything from my ankles to the small of my back. I want him to arouse sensations that come from somewhere other than my vagina," said one woman.
Maybe spending a little time on her inner thigh or kissing her wrist is not such a bad idea. And by doing so, she will likely do it to you as well, and who knows, maybe penetration will take a backseat to sensation.
Okay, I know what you think now. That she wants you to get down on her... Perhaps. But more than that, theres something else she wants in bed: hearing compliments. "The word "you" sounds sexy to a woman because you're referring to her as opposed to the act of sex.

#2. Full-body Lovemaking-Longer, more vocal oral sex
Now, on to your deeds down there. What do women secretly want? They want you to get deep down in there with your mouth, use your fingers, and when necessary, penetrate her with your penis for a little while, and then get busy again with your mouth.
Want to be perceived as a great lover? Then you must do more than getting your pleasure and moving on. Once you touch her, caress her entire body, not just her hardened nipples and the wet spot between her legs. Before even touching these hot spots, take your time to fondle her in less obvious places, like her neck and behind the ears. Trace slow, circular waves along your partner's most sensitive zones: her inner thighs, lower back and the palm of her hands.\

#3. Lead without Inhibitions-Curse like a sailor
In the spirit of being vocal, believe it or not, dirty talk was mentioned quite often. But it wasn't the flowery variety; the talk that many women wanted was downright nasty. She wants you to take the lead and hold the space for her to surrender to your enjoying her. Nothing is more masculine than taking the lead and showing that you have direction, you know what you want and you're going for it. The most common sexual fantasy for women is to be dominated in bed. Take her hands and place them over her head while you kiss her neck and whisper "You like this." And, thats not a question. Instead, tell her, "It's okay to go slow" or, "Im going to take off your bra" or, Im going to make love to you all night" or, "Next time, I'm going to f*ck you even harder". Also, stop being gentle when you make love. Women want to be taken, to be ravished. She'll be wildly turned on by mildly rough sex and explicit, downright sexual talk that would make her blush outside the bedroom. She wants to feel that you are going wild for her, and because of her.

#4: Good Sexual Performance-Get aggressive in bed
Wantin him to have raunchy sex with me and talk to me as though he just met me and cares nothing about what I want. I want him to ravish me like an animal and tell me to be quiet whenever I try to say something." Wow!
Just about every woman I encountered had the words "more aggressive sex" rolling off her tongue. From being tied up and spanked to having their hair pulled and being mildly asphyxiated, the women were quite enthusiastic about aggressive sex.I'm not implying that you should go home and smack your b!$%h up, but instead, maybe a little roughing in the bedroom can work wonders for your sex life. And if that's not enough, these women didn't simply want their men to be more aggressive; they wanted to, on occasion

-- Edited by giftedhotness on Tuesday 10th of August 2010 01:27:41 AM

Shes pissed

This is probably the most common reason that women withhold sex. If youve done something that made her furious, she may not be above punishing you by keeping the one thing you really, really want out of your reach. The last thing a woman wants to do when shes feeling any kind of negative emotion, whether its mad, sad, frustrated, annoyed, stressed, or worn out, is get busy between the sheets. While many guys can turn off the unpleasant feelings and get down to business, a woman finds it more difficult to push those emotions aside and get aroused. You might be satisfied with angry, violent sex, but she wants to work out her angst before she jumps into bed.

The solution to this is to find out why shes upset and try to fix it. Sometimes simply acknowledging that youve done something wrong is enough to make her calm down. Other times, the only way to get out of the doghouse is to participate in one of those long, heartfelt conversations in which you share feelings.

Shes asserting herself

If shes keeping the good loving from you, it may be an attempt to assert her power over you and the relationship. If theres one area of a relationship women think they have control over, its sex. She may just be doing it to show you whos boss in bed or she may be compensating for feeling powerless in some other aspect of her life. Maybe she has a cruel boss, a domineering best friend or an overprotective mother.

If you suspect that shes withholding sex to assert herself, the easiest way to get the carnal door open again is to compliment her sexual abilities and prowess. This may seem counterintuitive, but if you acknowledge how much you appreciate her in bed she may realize that trying to prove her status is unnecessary.

Shes manipulating you

Another reason women withhold sex is to get something out of you. When no other methods of getting what she wants are working, she might resort to revoking your sex privileges until you agree to what shes after. This will usually be a pretty big thing. Generally, shes not going to bother holding out on you in order to get you to take out the garbage.

The easiest way to get around this is to give her what she wants. If thats not a possibility, youll have to appeal to her sense of reason. If that doesnt work, try giving her something similar to what she wants. If you cant make that happen, you might have to wait it out and service yourself until she comes to her senses.

Shes bored

She could be avoiding sex with you because shes not enjoying it. Some women are embar****ed by the idea of talking about sex with their partners, especially if there is a problem. So instead of telling you whats wrong, she might just close up shop.
To get around her sex ban in this case, try suggesting something new sexually. Take her to a sex shop and buy something fun for both of you. Buy a book with suggestions on how to spice things up. If you show some interest and put some effort into making some changes, she may open up again.

Shes tired

Maybe shes not putting out because shes just too damn tired. Perhaps you want to do it more often than she does, and she just cant keep up. Other life demands might be stressing her out and keeping her busy too, making her too worn out to enjoy sex as often as youd like.

To get her back into the idea, pamper her with some relaxing treats beforehand. Draw her a bubble bath or give her a massage. If shes relaxed, shes more likely to feel sexy. Or, you could be truly unselfish and devote your time entirely to her pleasure for one night, making her more likely to want to return the favor another time. Also, you might consider cutting back a bit on the frequency. Instead of going to her every time youre aroused, take matters into your own hands every now and again.

Shes cheating

It is a possibility that shes kicking you out of bed because shes more interested in having sex with some other guy. If this is the case you have bigger problems than lack of sex in your relationship. If you suspect that she is cheating on you (and you should have more reasons than just a decline in your sex routine), confront her with your suspicions calmly and listen to her explanation. If you find out she is cheating, youll have to decide if you want to work on things or move on.

Playing games

Women withhold sex because men let them get away with it. Its pretty clear its the one thing that most guys cant live without and that theyll do pretty much anything to keep it coming on a regular basis. If you and your girlfriend can openly communicate, you should be able to talk through these issues as they come up instead of getting to the point where shes closing her legs while youre begging for it.

1. Fantasies About Your Current Partner
No kidding. This is the number one sex fantasy for most men: things you've done, or would like to do, to your partner. (It's her top fantasy too, by the way.) Why? Because available flesh-and-*lo** is often more of a turn-on than the unattainable.

2. Having Sex with a Woman Other Than Your Partner
Often, she's a past lover, a friend of your partner, perhaps a celebrity. The psychology behind this one isn't too difficult: lots of people long to have sex with someone new and fantasy is a great way of indulging this longing without losing your partner in the process.

3. Giving or Receiving Oral Sex
This is near the top of the list for both sexes. Fantasy fellatio has one vital ingredient: the woman doesn't do it to give pleasure. She does it to get pleasure.

Fantasies about giving her oral sex are common as well. Many women are more obviously turned-on by oral sex than intercourse and you, as the ultimate pleasure-giver, want to drive her crazy.

4. Sex with Two or More Women
If having sex with one woman feels good, having sex with two must double the fun. Throw in some lesbian lovemaking and this one sends most of you drifting off into la-la land. In your fantasy, you're superstud: capable of bringing both women intense multiple orgasms. However, studies show the vast majority of men don't want (and actually couldn't cope with) such sexual demands in real life.

5. Voyeurism and Exhibitionism
Few people would be able to keep themselves from watching a couple having sex if they were guaranteed not to get caught. The reason that voyeurism is a popular fantasy for both men and women is that sex is private and mostly hidden. Sure, we've seen couples do it on video, but it's rare we get to see the real thing.

Exhibitionistic fantasies often revolve around others admiring you. You put on a fine show (of course) and the voyeur is usually envious of your sexual skills, desperately wishing they were the person you were making love to. It's an ego-boosting fantasy.

6. Having Your Partner Masturbate for You
Watching your partner "play with herself" is up there on most men's wish lists, possibly because it reassures them that women are as into sex as they are. Also, the related fantasy of spying on her while she masturbates appeals to your curious side: what is she really up to when you're not around?

7. Anal Sex
It doesn't mean you've got "gay tendencies." The anus is undeniably an erotic zone, especially for men. A lot of you would love to have her penetrate you with a finger--or want to have anal intercourse with her--but worry she'll think you're gay if you suggest it. So you fantasize instead.

8. Bondage and S & M
Being tied up is often a favorite female role, tying someone up is often a favorite male role--which works out rather nicely if you play this one out in real life! Bondage fantasies are usually about power--having it or relinquishing it, and both sides have their appeal. Bondage usually comes to mind because it's the subject of many scenes in erotic books and movies.

Sadomasochistic (S and M) fantasies are less common but certainly not rare. Sadism is getting off on inflicting pain on someone else; masochism is getting off on someone hurting you. Most mild S and M fantasies revolve around whipping and spanking. Pleasure and pain are inextricably linked in the minds of some people and, in reality, spanking increases *lo** flow to the genital area (and therefore turns us on biologically). Masochistic fantasies sometimes stem from subconsciously thinking sex is bad and that you need to be punished for liking it.

9. Sexual Ravaging
Contrary to what most women believe, when you fantasize about forcing a woman to have sex with you it's more about overpowering her through your amazing sexual technique and charisma than violence. She starts off saying "no" then can't help but say "yes," given the superhunk that you are.

Conversely, if she's forcing you to have sex, you're indulging in a submissive sexual role quite unlike the one you probably have in real life.

10. Sex with Another Man
Same-sex fantasies or threesome fantasies involving another man are extremely common and don't mean you've got a secret wish to be gay. It just means you're sexually curious
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-- Edited by madest-one (Mod) on Wednesday 23rd of September 2009 08:50:36 AM

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All kinds of ways a man can do if you want to feel the peak of sexual pleasure. Ranging from masturbation to sex can be a solution. However, many men do not understand about the female orgasm. Moreover, the Eve sometimes pretend to have reached the climax to please her partner. In fact, no female sex could feel sexual pleasure. Possibly, the five ways below can produce results for you who want to make your partner orgasm:

1. Apply lubricant to the Miss V
Try wetting the outside of the vagina up into the hole by using a lubricant for heating. This is done so that the massage, the vagina is not abrasive. Do not Sepelekan this. The reason is easy vaginal abrasions or injured when hit by a blunt object penetration.

2. Play with the index finger
The second stage is practically easy. Your task now is to penetrate into the vagina by using the index finger. Move your finger straight and curved to form the letter u upside down over and over, do, pushing slowly and steadily toward the anus. This treatment can make a woman more relaxed in the area.

3. Press C-Spot
After Miss V was relaxed, do not keep your index finger from the Eves Garden. Now that must be done is to turn and bend your index finger to form the letter u repeatedly. Next, start slowly pushed up the clitoris with your partners expression changed. This stage is arguably difficult for some men because of not knowing exactly where the clitoris. Do the penetration of the clitoris per two seconds.

4. Play thumbs
This time you need help with your thumb as a substitute for finger. Play your thumb and repeat both. Except this time you have to massage the top of Miss V with your index finger. When hard, doing it with two hands. In this way, it could be your spouse will menggelinjang pleasure.

5. Sensations massage
In the fifth stage, you just do massage on the exterior of Miss V. How? Brief. Use your forefinger and thumb to massage from top to bottom.

When a woman reaches orgasm, her heart pounding. Do not be surprised when he was holding your hand tightly, or find another grip is not strong because of longer hold the pleasure they experienced. The characteristics of other female orgasm is a clear discharge from intimate organ. If true, congratulations .. You have successfully created a couple orgasm.

ring her bell

Once men begin to understand women's fanatical love of the phone and the crucial role that it plays in their lives, men can approach the phone with the respect it deserves, and treat telephone conversations with skilled tolerance rather than bored annoyance.

Learning to skillfully handle phone conversations can make the difference between a mediocre and a fantastic relationship. If you want to talk your way into her heart, you may need to do some of that talking over the phone.

If a phone conversation consists of a 30-second monosyllabic exchange to you, you may need to master 8 phone friendly moves to become a truly smooth operator in her eyes.

1- Have something to say

If you're the one making the call, make sure that you have something significant to say -- something she'd be interested in hearing. Calling to invite her out, ask for her fettuccine Alfredo recipe or what you should wear to dinner at your boss' house, or to tell her you love her new haircut, are all acceptable conversation starters (especially the part about the haircut).

2- Personalize your conversation

Many men complain that the phone is too impersonal, whereas for most woman, the phone is one of the most personal means of communication. Women don't use the phone just to call a cab. Nothing is too personal to talk about over the phone, and women can spend hours discussing their deepest and most intimate secrets, darkest fears, childhood traumas, and other emotional baggage.

You, however, might not be ready to discuss the deep pain you felt when your childhood puppy Binky was hit by a car. Nevertheless, there are steps you can take to make phone conversations with your honey less impersonal.

Try looking at a picture of her whilst talking on the phone. Seeing her face while you're speaking might help you feel more connected to her and may help you open up a bit.

3- Learn to multitask

So you think talking on the phone is a waste of time? Guess what? Your woman probably doesn't. Hang on, don't hang up yet. Talking on the phone doesn't mean the rest of your day has to be put on hold; all you have to do is learn to multitask.

To avoid devoting your full attention to the phone, buy one that has a speaker phone option, so you can talk while moving around; or better yet, invest in a handy headset, so you can have both your hands free to pursue, uh, other endeavors. Even a cordless can allow you to fold your clothing or even do the dishes, all the while chatting it up with your woman.

4- Become one with the phone
Multitasking is not for everybody -- if you really can't concentrate on clipping your toenails and talking on the phone at the same time, you may want to try focusing solely on the conversation itself. Chances are that if the two of you are talking in the first place, you do have a slight interest in what she has to say. So sit down, gaze lovingly into the phone receiver and just listen.

5- Ask open-ended questions

Open-ended questions require way more than a simple "yes" or "no" answer. Be prepared. Have a list of "safe" questions at your disposal, so that she can do most of the talking. For example, questions about her cat and her new stereo are phone-friendly.

Questions about her relationship with her mother or the picture of that mystery boy on her shelf are not. If, for some unforeseen reason, the phone conversation begins to veer in the direction of the meaning of your relationship, quickly intervene with a question about her award-winning chili, so you can sit back and let her gab away.

6- Take control of the conversation

It's true. Women's phone conversations have no emotional boundaries whatsoever, and if allowed to run wild, these conversations can run to dangerously steep emotional depths. If the only tears you want to shed while talking on the phone are from the onions you're chopping for your dinner, you need to take control of the conversation and steer it away from any deep, emotional drop-offs.

To remain in control of the chatter, you need to be the one doing most of the asking. If you merely respond to what she says, she may sneakily lure you into talking about your feelings and other "no-win situation" questions.

7- Always leave her wanting more

Who do you think is sexier: Peter Parker or Spider-Man? Spidey is because he's mysterious and unpredictable. So take his 8-legged lead and weave a web of mystery around your conversation. Don't tell her every teeny, insignificant detail about your life. Maybe you are a world-class ping-pong player -- but save that gem for another conversation.

8- Exit gracefully

Luckily for you, all phone conversations must, alas, come to an end -- but don't be fooled; you need to factor in at least an extra five minutes for the goodbye talk. Saying goodbye to a woman on the phone is like overtime in hockey -- we think the game's over, but oh no, there's a whole other period.

So get that stick back on the ice because abruptly saying "Gotta go, game's on," doesn't qualify as an acceptable goodbye. Ease into the finale. Try getting off the phone using sincere statements that let her know that you enjoyed the conversation and hope to see and talk to her soon. If you really are in a big rush, tell her your mother just walked in, your chili is burning, your phone battery is dying, or your pet rattlesnake isn't in his cage.

Bend her like Beckham

David Beckham is known for bending balls at will all over the pitch, so we dont consider it a stretch to assume that hes also adept at bending his wife all over the bedroom. To be like Becks, bend your lady over an ottoman or something similar, as long as it provides a clear view of the footy match on telly, and strike away. We hear this is the position Becks and Posh used to conceive their three kids, so if you're not looking to have a little dribbler of your own, we suggest you wear a Robben.

The Lionel Messy

Lionel Messi is widely considered the best player on the planet, with a playing style as smooth as silk and a tendency to leave his opponents in shambles. So to honor the Argentinian soccer god, lie your partner down on your finest silk sheet, grab a few cups of chimichurri (Argentina's national condiment), lather her up, and go at it as though you're two rabid animals covered in a parsley, minced garlic, olive oil, red wine vinegar, and red pepper flakes marinade. And, as luck would have it, you are.

The hand of God

Maradona scored this famous goal with an illegal use of the hand, so as punishment, handcuff your lover to the bed, then use both hands to give her a truly religious experience. Use one hand to gently massage her clitoris while the other penetrates her vagina like a pseudo-penis. If performed correctly, we assure you the results will be anything but controversial.

"I'm not mad at you."

Oh, yes she is. Don't think you're getting off that easily. This lie is one of the most frequently used in relationships. Typically, women who have been hurt by men in their lives -- often inadvertently -- use this phrase as an emotional defense. For example, if a guy forgets his girlfriend's birthday, calls her by his ex's name or commits any of the other minor screwups that most men do on a daily basis, women usually can't just let it go. They dwell on it, letting worries whittle away normal feelings of well-being like a dog gnaws on a bone.

Instead of admitting that she's actually quite hurt by his relatively minor offense, the woman will halfheartedly pretend that she doesn't care at all. In reality, she does care, very much so, but doesn't want to look too anal-retentive or b!$%hy about it, so she puts up the flimsiest of facades to indicate otherwise and tells one of the five lies all women tell.

Lie radar: This lie is extremely easy to pick up on because women barely bother to hide their irritation in this situation. As unfair as it may seem, they basically want men to read their minds and learn that, in this case, "No, I'm not angry" actually means "I am shooting invisible hate laser beams at you right now, please pick up on it." Excessive eye rolling, mean tones and passive-aggressive behavior in general are dead giveaways.

What you should do: Save yourself some time and headaches later on by calling her on her real feelings and discussing why she's so angry.

"I don't mind if you go to strip clubs with the boys."

Wow, you have the coolest girlfriend ever! Not quite. If this one sounds too good to be true, that's because it is. Word to the wise: Virtually all women mind when their men go out to ogle other women at strip clubs without them. It's only a question of how much they mind.

This one of the five lies women tell is very similar to lie No. 1, in that it is another fib that only comes up in relationships and is told by women to make themselves seem less pathetically needy. In general, women are extremely wary of their boyfriends being in highly sexually charged situations without them. Also, they hate to feel second best to a boys' night out. In this case, she's either telling one of the five lies all women tell to save face or to test you.

For the same reasons, they are also lying when they say they don't mind you checking out other women in front of them.

Lie radar: This lie is usually a little bit more artfully concealed than the first because it's a little bit more pathetic to own up to one's insecurity. It's best to just always assume that this statement is a lie.

What you should do: You're probably better off just not going. Ask yourself: Are two hours of bare booty worth weeks, even months, of b!$%hy comments?

"I'm just not ready for a boyfriend right now."

Once again, this statement is almost always false, although at least it's told with the best intentions, in order to soften rejection. It might be followed by an additional excuse such as: "I just came out of a bad relationship, and I don't want to be hurt again," or "I'm just too busy with my career right now to have a boyfriend." The truth is, if the woman is single and at all interested in you, she will certainly make the time to date you. It's that simple.

Lie radar: Does she seem uncomfortable, avoid eye contact, talk too much, and come up with numerous excuses? Liar, liar, miniskirt on fire.

What you should do: Let it go. Don't bother letting her know that you see through it. Take the easy way out by pretending you believe her for your own personal dignity, and just walk away.

"I don't mind picking up the tab tonight; you always pay anyway."

Not true. Although this lie doesn't apply to all women, most still do expect men to pay for things, especially if the man asked them out in the first place. They will secretly think that the guy is cheap if he wriggles out of the bill on a regular basis. Men should always at least offer to pay for dinner if they have asked the woman out. If she protests vigorously , then go Dutch; if she just protests casually, she's only doing it out of politeness -- so pay for it.

Lie radar: If she says: "Oh, I'll cover this," but doesn't even make the motion of rooting around in her purse for her wallet, it means that she has no real intention of paying.

What you should do: Dude, just go to the date fully prepared to pay for the whole shebang. In later stages of the relationship, you can work out a fair way to determine who treats who when, but in the early, critical dating stages, don't risk looking cheap.

"That was f*cking great!"

This lie falls under the broad category of sex lies. When women are committed to a man, they focus on him, often believing, time and time again, that he is "the one." Because girls have this tendency, they also tell guys whatever they think they want to hear (like they just had an orgasm), just to make them feel good about themselves.

Sex lies are a dime a dozen. Other sex untruths women often tell are the following: "I only cum with you"; "You have the longest penis"; "Yes, I came"; and "I've only been with X number of guys before." (They will decrease their actual number of sex partners because they're worried you will think they're promiscuous.)

Lie radar: When it comes to sex, that most sensitive of topics, it's safe to say that you should take most things she tells you with a grain of salt.

What you should do: You shouldn't be asking her to rate her sexual experiences, period. That's just in poor taste. If she offers you one of the lies above on her own, however, laugh and change the subject, as if to say: "That's flattering, but I don't really take these things too seriously as long as we're both happy with our sex life."

No.10 - Great sex comes naturally

The physical chemistry you see on TV and in the movies suggests that when two lovers meet, sparks fly and mind-blowing sex naturally follows. As we all know, in the real world, its not always that easy. The human body doesnt come with an instruction manual. The tricks of the trade that pleased a former partner do not always translate with someone new. Good communication is the key to good sex, as is a willingness to be open to trying new techniques and positions to find out what each partner finds pleasurable. It can be a little awkward at first to over-communicate during sex, but think about the outcome: a partner who knows how to do it right every time.

No.9 - Men have more sexual urges than women

Though many men would have you believe theyre ready to go 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, the truth is that men experience daily fluctuations in libido, as do women. A mans readiness to hop in the sack can be impacted by many of the same factors that impact a womans level of desire, including diet, sleep, health, stress, medical conditions, self-confidence, and relationship disharmony.

No.8 - After a certain age, sex is no longer important

Sex is an important aspect of physical and emotional health and well-being for adults of all ages, even those in their golden years. While some people believe that a decrease in libido is a natural part of aging, a loss of sexual desire can be related to a number of other factors including hormone deficiencies, depression, anxiety disorders, side effects of medication, changes to a relationship, communication barriers, or loss of a spouse or partner.

No.7 - Viagra is the answer

While many people believe Viagra and other similar oral medications are the best or only treatment for men with erectile dysfunction, the truth is that for many men these drugs are not a viable option or they simply are not effective. Oral medications are only a temporary fix to a problem that may have other underlying health causes that should be addressed by a qualified physician. In addition, many men with health conditions, including hypertension and diabetes, cannot take oral prescriptions due to serious potential side effects or contraindications with other medications. For men who cannot use oral meds, there are a number of other options including urethral suppositories and ICP, an injection that produces an erection within minutes.

No.6 - Size matters

Even if every guy you know can probably tell you exactly how big his penis is, size is not a barometer for manhood. As anyone with sexual experience knows, true sexual enthusiasm far outweighs any gifted parts. And contrary to another popular sex myth, the size of your member has nothing to do with the size of your hands or feet.

No.5 - Certain foods can put you in the mood

Named for the Greek goddess of sensuality and love, aphrodisiacs are said to put you in the mood. While oysters, dark chocolate, strawberries, and tiger penis might make you feel lamour, there is no scientific evidence to support the validity of aphrodisiacs. However, while there is no science to foods and/or herbs causing arousal, a certain food can trigger an erotic memory or desire in your own mind -- so in a sense, we all have our own aphrodisiacs.

No.4 - Oral sex is safer than vaginal and anal sex

From teenagers to former President Bill Clinton, oral sex seems to have the stigma of a free pass as far as sexual relationships go. Yes, it does count as sex, and yes, you can get a sexually transmitted disease from oral sex. There is still an exchange of fluids, meaning that diseases can enter your body through sores or small cuts in your mouth and throat.

No.3 - Premature ejaculation only affects young men

Some men do find that premature ejaculation begins at the onset of sexual maturity, but plenty of men also find it to be an issue later in life. In fact, premature ejaculation affects 30% of men at sometime in their lives.

Often, early ejaculation in men who are in their 30s or older is a co-symptom of erectile dysfunction or fatigue, poor cardiovascular conditioning, depression, anxiety, or neurological symptoms.

No.2 - Fantasizing about someone else is a bad thing

A large part of the sexual experience starts with your brain, not your body, and sometimes your brain can wander. If you are committed to your lady, and your relationship is in a good place, its OK to think about Angelina (Jolie) or Megan (Fox) every now and then.

No.1 - Women can't get pregnant if a man pulls out

The pull-out method, also known as the rhythm method, is potentially the worst possible form of birth control. Men do not always know when ejaculatory fluid begins to seep out -- and even ahead of a perceptible orgasm, pre-ejaculate (which includes sperm) is released and is enough to get a woman pregnant. In fact, one in five couples who use this method as their only form of birth control over the course of a year will end up pregnant.

Now that youve brushed up your knowledge on the top 10 sex myths, you can go out and have the best sex of your life. Just remember: While it is very important to stay safe and be smart, sex is not only a necessary bodily function, but also a very enjoyable bodily function.

Youve probably spent a considerable amount of time studying the female G-spot: How to find it, how to stimulate it and how to turn a woman into putty with a G-spot orgasm. What most men are far less familiar with is their own male G-spot. Thats right; some of you may be surprised to learn that the prostate is, essentially, the male equivalent of a womans G-spot -- and yours is far, far easier to find. We realize that, for some, the idea of exploring this area may be taboo, but if you keep an open mind while reading this article, our advice could lead you to one of the best orgasms you could ever hope for.

Read on as we give you the lowdown on the male G-spot and what it can do for your sex life.

Discovering your G-spot

The male G-spot isnt all that difficult to find, but it does require a little patience. Lying on your back is generally considered to be the most comfortable position for this, so youll probably want to make use of the bed or perhaps a large sofa. The process will be easiest with your legs elevated, which you can do by simply leaning your legs against the wall behind the bed or draping them over the back of the sofa. If youre still having difficulty reaching the perineum from this position, you can lift your backside further by sliding a pillow or two under your bum.

Once youve made yourself as comfortable as possible, start by gently massaging the area surrounding your anus. Most men enjoy having their taint (also known as the perineum) stimulated, and that can certainly be incorporated into this process. Use the soft pad of your index finger while exploring, and be gentle. As you relax further, lube your finger up and let it gently brush across the surface of your anus. Repeat this move several times, each time increasing the pressure slightly. When youre comfortable enough to begin probing, you should keep things slow and gentle, taking care to relax your sphincter during the process. Once youve come in contact with the male G-spot, youll recognize it as a small, chestnut-sized bump situated approximately two inches inward.

Stimulating your G-spot

The first step in stimulating the male G-spot is making oneself comfortable. Bathing beforehand can put a man more at ease with the process, so we recommend starting out with a nice hot shower. If youd like to take that one step further, enemas are not at all uncommon and you may choose to add this to your regimen. Once youre ready for stimulation, there are a number of methods you can utilize, though we recommend keeping it simple if youre a novice; a finger will be sufficient for beginners. Regardless, youll want a good supply of lubrication on hand, and youll want the type specifically created for anal play.

It will take some experimentation to discover what works best for you in terms of stimulation. Return to one of the positions we mentioned earlier (lying on your back with your legs and backside elevated) and repeat the steps you used to located the prostate. As you prepare to stimulate your G-spot, keep in mind that techniques vary greatly. Some men enjoy gentle thrusting movements, and some prefer intense, constant pressure on the prostate itself. You might prefer a mix of the two or something entirely different. The key is to give your body the chance to react and respond; take your time, the orgasm is worth it. Its also important to note that you may not find any of these methods pleasurable during the first exploration, and thats perfectly normal; you can always try again in the future.

techniques and toys

Finger

Weve already mentioned this one, but you shouldnt limit this method to solo exploration. Believe it or not, many women enjoy performing this type of stimulation in the bedroom, particularly when the resulting orgasms can be so powerful. If youd like to try something highly erotic, have her give you a blow job while stimulating your prostate.

G-spot goodie: Brace your hands against the back of a sofa and bend over at a 90-degree angle. Spread your legs apart and have your woman get on her knees in front of you. This will allow her to perform oral sex while still being able to stimulate your prostate.

Rim job

There was a time when most women had no idea what a rim job was -- those days are long past, and most are quite savvy with the technique these days. If youd like to add a little extra ecstasy to your next sex session, bring up the subject of reciprocal rim jobs. Its quite simple, really: When youre both fresh out of the bath, use your tongue to gently probe each others anuses. The sensation is truly incredible and youre both sure to enjoy it.

G-spot goodie: Magnify your orgasms by manually stimulating each other during the rim job; toying with her clitoris should lead to a powerful climax for her, and a well-timed hand job will guarantee your own.

Butt plug

If youd like to combine sex and prostate stimulation, butt plugs are one of the simplest options available on the market. They can be used during blow jobs or actual intercourse. Butt plugs come in a variety of shapes and sizes, so you neednt worry about the experience being painful or uncomfortable; simply choose the size that meets your requirements.

G-spot goodie: If youd like to experience something truly incredible, work your PC muscles while penetrating your woman. This will stimulate the male G-spot further than you could possibly imagine.

Common libido killers

The most common libido killers are stress, children, relationship problems, physical injuries or lack of physical ability, and illness. Libido is fairly fragile at times and relies on many different human aspects -- emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual -- to work in harmony.

1- Psychological hindrances

Confidence: Confidence issues and stress are both major hindrances to a healthy sex life. Bad self-image is the worst offender, with weight issues topping the list. These are the women who always want the lights out and won't fully undress in front of you. It can take a long time for a woman to get comfortable in her own skin, and the best thing you can do is reassure her that she is beautiful and desirable. Find the parts of her you love (her brain as well as her body), and remind her how great she is as often as you like.

Stress: Most people are a little stressed, but when it starts to affect your sex life, it becomes a problem. Stress relief is in order here, but how that is achieved is up to you and her. Take the bull by the horns, and provide a relaxing massage and a bit of pampering -- this will go a long way. Just watch out if she is stressed and tired because a great massage may put her to sleep!

Anxiety: If she is anxious, she won't be randy. Along with stress, feeling anxious about sex for whatever reason (perhaps childhood abuse, rape or other fears) is a tragedy not only for your sex life, but for her whole life. She needs to figure out and overcome her reasons for feeling anxious, and the best thing you can do is support her. It won't be easy, but with good communication, it can be handled and eventually resolved.

2- Physical health

Lack of physical exercise: Women who exercise regularly have higher sex drives, and more often than not, their periods are less painful and PMS is a lot less severe or even nonexistent. In fact, if a woman does regular strenuous exercise (four times a week for about an hour), she is far less likely to suffer from hormone-induced problems. This happens because when the body is healthy, small chemical and hormone changes have the effect they're supposed to have -- preparing the body for pregnancy -- instead of causing major disturbances to chemicals in the brain and wreaking havoc on the body and mind.

It can be an extremely stupid thing to suggest to a woman that she exercise more, so by suggesting physical activities you can do together (like going for jogs or rollerblading), you are improving your own sex life (and overall health and happiness) as well as hers. 

Poor diet

Diet plays a major role in painful periods, and in overall happiness and well-being. Her diet can be stopping her from feeling her best, so taking a good look at what goes in will help to determine what her body dishes out. After all, we are what we eat. Again, suggesting she stop eating crap food is going to land you in the dog house, so make these changes to your own eating habits so she doesnt feel she is being picked on. Let her learn by your example. Swap the chips for a salad, the Coke for water, and both your energy levels will rise as a result. More energy for life means more energy for sex. 

Toxic overload

If we dont help our bodies clear out toxins, they will build up and give us zits, odors and low energy levels. Helping our bodies rid the toxins will make us feel better quite easily and quickly. Smoking, pollution, lack of exercise, bad diet, and being overweight all make us feel less stellar than we should, and these factors also kill our sex drives. The best ways to rid our bodies of toxins are to drink plenty of water and antioxidants like green tea, and get exercise.

PMT

PMT can affect her in the week or days before her period. All women experience premenstrual changes, but some have what is clearly defined as a serious problem. You probably know of women who suffer from PMT: they are the women you refer to as The b!$%h or The Psycho. Their behavior is irrational, illogical, emotional, and fraught with tension and anxiety. One minute they may seem perfectly fine, and the next they are a raging maniac, crying, yelling, and being irritable.

This may be a bad time for trying to have sex, and saying something like, Have you got your period? will go over like a lead balloon. In saying this, sometimes increased premenstrual aggression means sex is especially vigorous and primal. Women are extra sensitive during this time because of high estrogen levels. The best way to deal with this is to avoid arguing back, and if you want to help fix the problem, encourage her to do some exercise and other stress-relieving activities (and yes, sex is one of these, but do try others). 

Birth control

Oral contraceptive pill: The OCP is a small pill that controls the bodys hormones artificially to prevent pregnancy. The good news: The freedom gained from the pill is an aphrodisiac; knowing she wont get pregnant is liberating, and definitely encouraging for both of you. The bad news: The pill can be dangerous for a womans libido. Her hormones are leveled completely (and artificially), which rules out the sexual peak at ovulation (most birth control pills force the body to skip ovulation) and just before her period. It effects the body by increasing the levels of something called SHBG (sex hormone-binding globulin), which attaches itself to testosterone in her *la*hdstream, rendering it useless.

Testosterone is responsible for much of a woman's sex drive, so the loss of her already low levels is bad news. This can be a trade off, because we all love raw sex. Going off the pill may not be the best idea, so get her to ask her doctor for an alternative type of birth control.

Depo-Provera injection: This injection is a high dose of artificial progesterone. This tricks the body into thinking it is already pregnant, but progesterone inhibits the production of estrogen, which is essential for the health of her reproductive system and, therefore, essential to her sex drive. The lack of estrogen can cause a problem called atrophic vaginitis, which can make sex painful and cause serious and uncomfortable problems with the urinary tract, vagina and vulva.

This form of birth control has been linked with mental health issues, weight gain and vaginal problems that hinder sex by making it painful and uncomfortable. Aside from those symptoms, it decreases sex drive considerably in most women, which is obviously not good for you.

Implanon implants: Similar to Depo-Provera, this implant is a slow release of progesterone that can last in the body for up to three years.

The good news: Her sex drive may hit the roof (or the floor), taking you with it. If it works for her, it is a good (and sex-a-plenty) alternative to the pill. The bad news: This matchstick-size implant can wreak havoc with her body, resulting in a very high sex drive, but almost black-widow-like behavior (she'll hunt you down, screw you, then eat you alive). The side effects -- moodiness, obsessive behavior, acne, and depression -- can be very destructive. It also causes swelling of the brain. Every woman experiences different changes in libido, both positive and negative, while using this form of birth control.

Prescription drugs

Antidepressants: Some antidepressants can increase libido in women, while others, such as Prozac, reduce it significantly. There are some that have had fewer reported sexual side effects, so if one antidepressant doesn't work well, there are other options. Overall, antidepressants help encourage sex because she will be feeling better about life in general and will have more energy, but orgasm can often be delayed or not happen at all. In this case, good communication is essential because a chemistry problem can turn into a psychological problem very quickly. If you have to kiss and play around while she gets better, then so be it; pressure to have sex is also a libido killer.

*la*hd pressure drugs: Most *la*hd pressure drugs kill a woman's sex drive, so other drugs may be prescribed to counter this. The doctor may try a few different types of *la*hd pressure drugs to find one that won't affect her sex drive. The reason for the high *la*hd pressure needs to be addressed so she can get back to full health, and easy ways to help this are encouraging exercise and good diet, and doing fun, stress-free activities.

Sedatives: Medications like Xanex, Diazepam and Valium are known to lower ones sex drive and ability to be aroused. Occasionally, this may result in an inability to reach orgasm, which can be a terrifying and stressful experience. Most sedatives do exactly that -- sedate the body and mind. Having high energy levels and normal brain-body function is impaired significantly, leaving women feeling more like a lobotomized zombie than a sex goddess. It is hard to help things like this when the doctor seems to be in charge, and the reasons for being on sedatives are unique. Keeping the body as toxin-free as possible is always a good idea, so exercise, water and doing fun things will help her regain her health and well-being.

Other prescription drugs: Antihistamines can effect lubrication and cause drowsiness; antipsychotic, anti-seizure, anti-cancer, and non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs can all effect libido in a negative way.

Recreational drugs

Ecstasy: This drug is great for making out, and her sex drive is likely to go through the roof when shes on it since her body is in the best mood ever, and everything feels great. The negative effects of ecstasy use are the after-effects of low serotonin -- depression of normal body functions while the body realigns itself chemically and physically. Ecstasy is an aphrodisiac, but regular use is bad news.

Marijuana: Smoking pot has a depressant effect on the body, therefore, this drug is a libido killer. It also dries the vagina (and mouth) up, which is not helpful. If you want to have sex, dont get her stoned.

Amphetamines (speed, crystal meth): Amphetamines are known to cause sexual dysfunction in both men and women. While speeding, sex is likely to be far from her (and your) mind, but talking a lot, and really fast, will not be.

Opiates (seroin, cocaine): Opiates are linked with the inability to orgasm and low sexual desire. Men may find they cannot get an erection, and women can have problems with moisture. Most people who use heroin say that sex is very low on the list of important things to do. Cocaine can be good for confidence, and sometimes increase sensations, but overall it is a slack aphrodisiac.

Illnesses and disorders

Thyroid: Problems with the thyroid directly affect hormones, which in turn wreaks chaos with a womans sex drive. It is one of the most undiagnosed problems with low sex drive because it is not really talked about as a symptom.

Adrenal glands: The adrenal glands are responsible for producing some of the testosterone in women, so when this gland is not performing to its peak, the amount of testosterone (the sex hormone) is lowered. This means shell experiences less desire to have sex at any time. This gland is what keeps a womans sex drive active after menopause (when the ovaries, which are responsible for the rest of the testosterone, cease to function). 

Hysterectomy: The removal of the uterus (and sometimes the fallopian tubes and ovaries) effects women differently. In studies, half the women experienced an improvement in their sex lives, with 21% seeing a decrease in desire and enjoyment. This shows that it could go either way. Depending on the circumstances of the hysterectomy, there will be many other factors influencing her sexuality and well-being. Because of the low levels of testosterone, she may end up with other problems, like thyroid deficiency, low energy levels and moodiness.

For some guys, facial hair is an afterthought. For others, its a creative way to play with their image. Facial hair can be used to heighten strong features and even to cover up flaws. Whatever the case, it needs to be well-kept and managed. Here we present an introduction to common beard and moustache styles. Though countless facial hair styles exist (who would have thought), the choice is a very personal one. These styles are presented to get you better acquainted with some popular options and help you put your best face forward.

Five oclock shadow

The five oclock shadow refers to the growth of hair that appears late in the day after clean-shaving your face in the morning. Closely related styles include light and heavy stubble, in which hair growth is continued for one to several days, depending on how quick growth is. This style is easily maintained with a beard trimmer. Not only can this rugged look add definition to faces with softer bone structure, but you may never need to pick up a razor again.

Circle beard

The circle beard, also known as the door knocker, is achieved when a moustache and chin beard are connected along the sides of the mouth. Guys often confuse this with the Van Dyck, a moustache worn with a goatee that is not connected. While it can add length to a round face, it can also add weight if not properly cared for. Avoid heavier growth with regular trimmings.

Goatee

Technically, the goatee refers to hair growth on the chin only, resembling that of a goat. Nowadays, however, it is common for guys to refer to the Van Dyck -- a moustache worn with a chin beard that is not connected -- as a goatee. This can be a good option for rounder faces because it adds length and width. Guys with lighter-colored, finer hair may find it challenging to develop a pronounced goatee.

Balbo

The balbo is similar to the Van Dyck, in which a mustache is worn with a goatee but is not connected. In this style, the goatee is shaped to form an upside-down T. To achieve this look youll need to grow your beard out for a few weeks, shave off the sides, and then shape using a trimmer. An alternative version of the balbo is to wear it without a moustache.

Chinstrap

Resembling a chinstrap, here the hair extends downward from the sideburns along the jaw line, connecting at the chin. This style is kept trim and can be worn with or without a moustache. Not to be confused with the chin curtain, a version in which the beard is longer and covers the chin, this style is common in R&B and hip-hop culture. It can help create a jawline and frame the face.

Soul patch

The soul patch, also known as the flavor saver, refers to a small growth of hair under the lower lip. It can include a bit of hair above the chin, but generally does not. When worn narrow, neat and trimmed, it is acceptable for daily wear. When more pronounced, however, this style should be limited to younger guys with an alternative street style. To achieve this look, shave the entire face, except for the hair under the lower lip, for several weeks.

Mutton chops

Mutton chops consist of sideburns that are grown long to extend to the corners of the mouth, with the moustache and goatee shaven off. A commonly associated style is the friendly mutton chops, in which the sideburns ultimately connect to an integrated mustache. Sideburns a la mutton chop are best maintained with an electric razor. Because this style is atypical, its best suited for guys in an artistic line of work.

Chevron

If the chevron has you thinking of men of the 1970s, you have the right idea. This classic style consists of a full, wide moustache that generally hangs slightly over the upper lip. Worn thick, this look reads masculine but dated. Updating this style involves paying close attention to length, so be sure to keep unruly lengths under control with weekly trimmings.

Horseshoe

Resembling an inverted horseshoe, this style consists of a full moustache with growth vertically extending down from the corners of the lips and ending at the jaw line. It is often confused with the fu manchu, where the vertical extensions are downward-pointing and extend beyond the jaw line. This look is a nod to the Old American West and can be a fun, alternative moustache style (depending on your profession, of course).

Handlebar

If you thought that the handlebar was reserved for Mario and Luigi, think again. This styles popularity is on the rise thanks to hipsters and beatniks. Here, the moustache is grown bushy and long enough to achieve upward-pointing ends. Since the pointed ends are achieved by the use of products, such as styling wax, the look is high-maintenance. Depending on your personality, handlebars can be worn large or small, though todays version veers towards the latter (a modern-day take on the barbershop quartet look).

Full beard

The traditional full beard style consists of growth along the upper lip, chin, sides, and is connected to the sideburns. The moustache is generally integrated, but can be styled. While this is a good option for guys with weaker jawlines, it may not be appropriate for conservative environments or girlfriends who prefer a softer touch. Associated styles include the garibaldi, a wide, full beard with a rounded bottom, and the verdi, a shorter version with a prominent mustache.

Learning to shave is one of the few coming-of-age rituals that all men must endure. From the very first time that cold, hard metal takes a swipe at your facial hair, it instantly becomes an integral part of your routine until the day you die. And while the trends in beards and the technology in razor blades will change, the basics of getting a great shave never do. Here are your timeless shaving dos & don'ts.

Do- Use a preshave & postshave routine

Taming the mane requires more than a rinse and a razor. Proper preshave treatment should include facial scrub to cleanse and soften the beard. For more sensitive skin types, try a specially formulated oil or gel to prep the area prior to doing the deed. Then, follow up with an aftershave balm. Check out The Art of Shaving line for product ideas.

Dont- Soap up

Bar soaps are barely acceptable for washing your hands, let alone washing your face. They tend to leave residue and dry skin in their wake, and the moisturizing ones that claim to do just the opposite cant compete with advancements in liquid face washes and scrubs. A multiaction lathering gel, on the other hand, will dissolve excess oil and unclog pores effectively for a stress-free shave.

Do- Shave after showering

Pores need to be wide open for close, clean shaves that minimize skin irritation, and there is no better way to loosen things up than in the shower. The steam causes pores to relax and skin to soften, allowing the blade to glide seamlessly across your face. Invest in a fogless shower mirror for the all-inclusive experience or take the task sink-side for some aftershower action.

Don't- Splash on cold water

Paying attention to the water temperature in your grooming routine may seem like splitting hairs, but it has a significant impact on the success of your shave. In much the same way that warm or hot water pushes pores to open, cold water can cause them to close up shop. Trying to rip hairs out of tighter pores is significantly more challenging -- and irritating -- than shaving supple skin (and all it takes is a more aggressive twist of the faucet).

Do- Use short strokes

Somewhere in a long-lost father-son handbook must have been misguided advice to shave with endless strokes -- the kind that meander from cheek to jaw and curve underneath before reaching their final destination at the base of the neck. Its a mouthful as much as it is mistaken. Short strokes provide a more precise shave that reduces the amount of pressure placed on the blade handle. This translates into closeness without the cuts.

Don't- Apply too much pressure

Attempting to get a flawless shave is hard enough, so no additional pressure is necessary. Pushing on the blade and increasing its force on the face wont make for a smoother shave. Instead, the razor will end up dragging across the skin. The result: A *la*hdy mess of bumps, bruises, nicks, and cuts. Pop a chill pill and let the blade work its magic through guiding and gliding.

Do- Change blades often

Nothing is worse for your skin than shaving with a rusty razor. Although it may not quite get to the point of full-on corrosion, quality cartridges like those from the Gillette family of products, such as the Gillette Fusion, have a handy indicator strip for determining razor-readiness. When it begins fading to white, its time for a change.

Don't- Dry-shave

Dry-shaving is right up there with never-ending shaving strokes in that old-school father-son handbook. And as strange as it may sound to those fluent in the most basic how-tos of shaving, there is still a segment of the male population that goes bare. Its a strategy typically employed by electric-razor lovers, but everyone, including follically challenged men, must use some sort of shaving cream. It helps create a buffer to protect the skin from the blades harshness, which knows no bounds.

1. The Needy Guy

He is overly emotional and shares all his feelings with her right away. The Needy Guy also doubts himself and needs constant reassurance about his relationship, work and friendships.

Why he is so unappealing: Confidence and independence are very sexy traits in a man -- insecurity and dependence are not. Most women look for a strong partner they can lean on. So if you are always leaning on her -- especially in the early stages of a relationship -- she might doubt your ability to do this. And since women tend to come into relationships with all sorts of insecurities, she won't want to deal with yours as well as her own.

What to do if you're that guy: Timing is everything, so you just need to keep your feelings in check at the beginning of the relationship. Try to hold off on sharing all your feelings or divulging your insecurities. Once you are far enough along in the relationship, you can share as much as you want. By that point, she'll appreciate knowing what's on your mind.

2. The Predictable Guy
Women don't like the Predictable Guy because they know exactly how he'll react to everything. He follows formulas and never wants to do anything differently. For example, he'd never surprise a woman by spontaneously taking her out for the night.

Why he is so unappealing: Women look for a certain amount of unpredictability in a man -- they want a free spirit. This is why some women seem to be drawn to the notorious "bad boy." It's not that they are drawn to his badness exactly, but rather to his unpredictability.

3. The Arrogant Guy

He has a huge ego and he's condescending. He is also rude -- not necessarily to her, but to anyone he perceives as beneath him. And that's just as bad as being rude directly to her.

Why he is so unappealing: A woman often looks at how a man treats other people to assess his personality. So even though you might be nice to her on a date, she'll be paying attention to how you act with other people too.

What to do if you're that guy: No woman wants to be talked down to, so I shouldn't have to tell you to shed the ego when you are dealing with her directly. But in order to really impress her, you need to treat everyone around you with a certain amount of respect -- because she'll be watching.

4. The Boorish Guy
The Boorish Guy doesn't try to hide the fact that he's checking out other women while in her presence; he flirts with the waitress and he even goes as far as to brag about his past conquests. Overall, he lacks respect for women.

Why he is so unappealing: Not only is this type of behavior infuriating, it can also be bad for a woman's self-esteem. If you act like this when you are first getting to know a woman, you won't stand a chance.

What to do if you're that guy: If you can't curb this kind of behavior permanently, then you at least have to keep it in check when making a first impression. Keep your flirting and wandering eyes at bay -- and maybe eventually it'll become a habit. Because, truthfully, if you introduce this kind of behavior into a relationship at any point, she won't be pleased.

5. The Cheap Guy

He invites a woman to dinner and then subtly suggests they go Dutch. He never splurges to buy her flowers and he always opts for the cheapest wine. He makes her feel like they're on a tight budget from the very first date.

Why he is so unappealing: Your first few dates should always be carefree; the words "saving" and "budget" shouldn't come up. If she spends the first date picturing a lifetime of penny-pinching with you, you're out of luck.

What to do if you're that guy: Loosen up the purse strings a little when you're courting a woman. You don't need to spend a fortune to make a good impression, but you do need to make her feel like she's special. Flowers are a nice touch once in a while.

6. The Arguer

This type of guy turns every conversation into an argument. When he takes a woman out, he makes her feel like she's in debate class rather than on a date. And in doing so, he makes her feel defensive and self-conscious.

Why he is so unappealing: A date should be a pleasant experience, but if she's on the defensive the whole time, she will not be enjoying herself. Remember this: Constant arguing and debating is a stress -- and you certainly don't want her to associate you with a stressful experience.

What to do if you're that guy: Most importantly, relax. If you are this type of guy, you probably revert to debating because you are nervous or unsure of what to say. So before the date, brainstorm conversation topics and questions you can ask her. That way, you won't be as likely to revert to arguing during lulls in the conversation.

7. The Self-Righteous Guy

This guy is very judgmental of others. He probably doesn't drink or smoke, and he doesn't hesitate to tell others to follow suit. From the very first date, he'll preach to a woman, telling her she shouldn't drink wine or get dessert.

Why he is so unappealing: No one wants to be judged, especially on a date. She'll just find it annoying and rude.

What to do if you're that guy: You can preach a little once you are actually in a relationship. But until that point, her drinking, smoking and dessert-eating habits are none of your business.

8. The Misogynist

This guy makes no secret of his bitterness toward women. On a date, he can't help but exude negativity toward his companion and the entire female gender by making rude and insulting comments.

Why he is so unappealing: This is the only type of behavior on this list that is, in fact, a total deal-breaker. And it's not surprising. What woman do you know that would like to be in a relationship with a man like this?

What to do if you're that guy: You need to reconsider your attitude if you are this type of guy. This type of behavior is not only rude and nasty, it is often the last straw in breaking up a relationship.

It goes without saying that presentation is important, so regardless of what you purchase, it needs some exterior attention. Just as you spiffed yourself up for your first date to make a good impression, even the best gift can be dulled if it's haphazardly duct-taped with newspaper wrapping. Pay the extra cash and get a professional wrapping job if you doubt you can pull it off on your own. Now, let's turn our attention to what will be inside that package, and exactly what she's going to think about it.

Jewelry

Because jewelry is often expensive and can be easily shown off, it's usually reserved for serious relationships. Giving her something sparkly will have her thinking that your relationship is solid and that your commitment to her is assured. Women are well aware that men don't drop major cash on a casual fling, and will take your gift as a cue that you love her. Be wary of giving jewelry too soon as you could be faced with one of two undesirable reactions: 1) It could scare off a woman not sure about her own feelings for you; or 2) It could annoy a woman thinking that you are trying to buy her affection.

Perfume

Perfume is the ultimate in personal gifts, even more so than jewelry. What a woman chooses to wear as a scent is very unique and is usually very subjective. That being said, you really need to know a woman well to head to the perfume counter and successfully choose a winner on your own. Since it can seem like a last-minute purchase that is bordering on cliche and the chance that you won't impress her is too great, steer clear of this type of purchase unless you are simply replenishing a favorite of hers that you've admired all year.

Gadgets

Living in a high-tech world, it wouldn't be unusual to gift your lady with a gadget. Whether it's an iPod for your commuting honey or an electronic organizer for your executive wife, gadgets are pricey and let her know that you think she deserves something to make her life a little easier. Because of the variety of gadgets out there, you also have a chance to show her exactly how much thought you put into picking the perfect gift by taking her lifestyle and needs into account.

A little gift-giving advice: Don't take over her new toy and insist on setting everything up for her -- let her take control and figure it out on her own. If you need to get your hands on it, do so before you wrap it up; feel free to load up the iPod with her favorite music or input important numbers into a new phone for some bonus points.

Trips

Giving the gift of your time is one of the simplest and most well-received presents around. Add the dedication of your time to anything from an exotic trip to a quick weekend getaway, and you're giving her the gift of an exciting shared experience.

Moreover, most women will take this gift as a sign that spending time together is important to you and that you value your relationship. This gift is also a great idea for the girl in your life who seems to have it all or if you want to avoid buying a material gift just for the sake of it. Be sure not to assume you know her schedule, and have a plan in mind that is flexible enough so that the two of you can work out the dates of the trip together.

Domestic gifts

Outside of specific requests, gifts that are domestic can send the message that you don't have an ounce of romance in your body or that you only see her as a tool for getting chores done around the house. While a new vacuum cleaner might be useful, practicality doesn't always stoke the fires of passion or make a woman feel special.

If you're determined to give a gift that isn't frivolous, leaning more toward luxury versions of everyday products might be the way to go. For example, a beautiful set of Egyptian cotton sheets or the newest fancy coffeemaker are the kinds of things that show her that you want to elevate her everyday activities to a whole new level (and not tie her to another to-do list).

Gift certificate

You may think that a gift certificate is an ideal present for a picky girlfriend who is always returning gifts and who loves to shop, but it's really a cop-out on trying to find something special for someone you care about. While she might appreciate getting to pick out something at your expense, it will probably leave her feeling like you couldn't be bothered to find something she might enjoy.

If your lady is a certified shopaholic and gift certificates are the only way to go, at least buy a little something to go along with it to up your non-financial contribution; such as a gift certificate and a pedicure for an adoring shoe addict.

Food/drink

While pleasant chocolates and wine are the kinds of gifts that you give to your neighbors, your coworkers or your see-once-a-year uncle -- they aren't for girlfriends. If you happen to be dating a genuine foodie with a penchant for gourmet products, by all means spoil her a little with a few special items to enjoy that she wouldn't normally indulge in. Otherwise, food items can seem generic, thoughtless and even cheap.

We aren't by any means saying that a little chocolate doesn't go a long way, but as the sole gift, it's an overall loser. If you want to include some food in your gift, go ahead, but be sure to use it as a side dish rather than the main course.

Cutesy jealousy

If you went up to the average gal on the street and asked her: "Do women want men to get jealous? there's a good shot she'd say yes. No, that is not the end of this article. This fact actually means very little because, as is often the case, most women have no clue what they really want. Do women want to be appreciated by their men? Yes. Do they want to feel attractive to the man they've been dating for a long time? Of course. Would the average women want her man to express mild concern over her (innocently) hanging out with another guy? Sure. However, here's where things get tricky: A woman may think she wants her man to get jealous -- but the jealousy she's after is cutesy jealousy. It bears little resemblance to actual jealousy and may or may not make the female race more annoying to you than ever before. Heres what can fall under cutesy jealousy.

Sweet territorialism

You're at the bar with your girlfriend and a bunch of friends and you notice a few other guys checking her out as she heads back to your table with drinks. When she arrives back at the table, you throw an arm over her shoulders. This simple move says: "Yes, I notice you're looking hot tonight and yes, I also notice you're getting looks from other guys." It's silent and sweet. You know what's not silent and sweet? Acting like a douche and getting in the face of any of those aforementioned guys over looking at your girl. This isnt an episode of The Sopranos.

Confident joking

Your girl is all dolled up and ready to head out for a girl's night out. She kisses you goodbye and you smile and say: Watch out for other penises! Its ridiculous and funny, and even if youre not entirely serious about it (because you trust her, not because you think shes an ugly hag who cant get other guys), it still shows you care.

Bottom line

Don't listen to women (kidding... but not really. Make exceptions for your mother and this section of the site, of course). Unless your (crazy) chick is into Ike and Tina role-play, she's not craving real jealousy from you.

Real jealousy

Real jealousy and cutesy jealousy have absolutely zero in common with each other. Real jealousy is often suffocating and sometimes completely psycho at whatever stage of the relationship youre at. For those on the prowl or just starting to date a new girl, playing it a little cool and disinterested will be much more beneficial to your overall game than being overprotective and territorial. For guys in long-term relationships, the lack of trust exhibited in real jealousy can completely ruin any partnership. Here are the red-flag behaviors to steer clear of.

Out-of-control anger

If you find yourself resembling the Hulk at any point in a relationship, its time to back away slowly. Real jealousy rears its ugly head when either partner becomes uncontrollably angry for no justifiable reason. And it doesnt count if its only justifiable to you.

Invisible suitors

Are you automatically assuming that every male your girlfriend comes in contact with is a risk who might take her away from you? Even if there isnt a male in question, does your mind get carried away imagining that there will be a male wherever she happens to go without you? If so, youre heading into the danger zone. Irrational jealousy accomplishes nothing except making you seem insecure -- and it sure as hell wont stop a girl from cheating if shes planning to already. In fact, it might even drive her to it.

Bottom line

Jealousy equals insecurity. Insecurity equals unattractive. You really can use math in real life

Honesty is the best policy?

Not even close. While little boys need to lie all the time, real men realize that anything in excess is a recipe for disaster and that includes telling the truth. With the most obvious questions like, Does this dress make me look fat? all the way to Do you think shes pretty? the concept that absolute honesty is the key to a relationship is lunacy. But you may wonder what questions to answer honestly. Wonder no more -- remember that here your honesty is not only welcome but expected. Youre in the company of men and thats the truth.

Be honest about questions that will lead to embar****ment

Keep in mind that she knows the dress makes her look fat or that her speech for work is terrible. However, shes passing the bad guy duty off to you. Well, take it. Keep in mind that you dont want her going out there only to get ridiculed or embar****ed. Be honest but dont be a giant tool about it. Be straightforward but remember pissing off your girl is not a smart move. Being honest with her (like: That dress doesnt flatter you, but you work that short black one) may get you props and laid in one move. Lying, though, will come back to bite you when she hears, Why did he let you wear that? from some skank at her job.

Be honest about questions that will keep her game up

When she asks if you think some girl is pretty, be honest. Say Hell yes. Why? Because, one, she knows you think the other woman is attractive; and, two, if you lie, shell come back with Im secure enough to hear if you find someone pretty blah blah blah. Telling her that other women are always attractive reminds her that youre not some whipped  puppy dog thats mindless and blind. It reminds her that youre a man with options and you choose to be with her while she keeps her game up, her skills tight and her body good.

Be honest about questions that keep you from cutting them off

If she says: Would you mind not going out with the guys Friday so we can spend time with my mom who I just saw yesterday? You say, Hell yes. If she says: Im going to that baby shower on Saturday, what time can we leave? You say: Have a nice time, baby, without me. These types of questions are laid out to slowly emasculate and dethrone you as a man with a mind of his own. Answering these questions are steps in building what can and cannot be expected of you. You draw the line in the sand and remind her that youre a man.

Shy guys can be fly

But once the shy guy matured, he may have found that women were drawn to him. Surprising? The appeal of a shy gentleman could lend itself to the intrigue he possesses; the less he says about himself, the more mysterious he seems. And the quiet guy standing alone at the bar could come across as a lone ranger, stopping in for a drink before hopping back onto his steed.

Women also like the challenge of cracking open the reserved guy. We know there's a wild animal lurking inside that innocent physique, and we want to be his tamer. It's common for women to take pride in successfully breaking a guy out of his shell and making him wild for her eyes only.

Shyness can also come across as modesty, as the bashful guy tends to lay low in a crowd and avoids being the center of attention. But while shyness can be "adorable" and appealing to the opposite sex, it can also become downright annoying after a while.

Shy? please, goodbye!

Besides the ladies who are jerk magnets, most women don't want an overconfident, ****y man when it comes to a serious relationship, nor do they want a man they have to take care of. But if shy men are intriguing, how could they not be all they're cracked up to be?

Never makes the first move
Women want their guys to ask them out, plan the evening and kiss them when they least expect it -- in short, take chances. I know going out on a limb and risking rejection is frustrating, but you'll get nowhere fast if you refuse to make that first move. In addition to a lack of initiative, shy people generally tend to be more passive, and a man who's indifferent about everything and always aims to please can become annoying, even with the best of intentions. Don't hesitate to state your opinions or objections, if you have any.

No spontaneity
Once you're dating a woman and you think she might be falling for you, you can really make her fall to her knees by planning a spontaneous date, without worrying about how she feels and what she thinks. Pick her up and don't tell her where you're going, take her hand in yours when the moment is right, and swing her in your arms when you feel like doing so. If a man is too shy, chances are he'll always be on his tiptoes trying to please her, rather than let loose and show her how lively he can really be.

Always asks for permission
Along with a lack of spontaneity comes a constant need for approval by asking a woman before doing anything, from kissing her to putting his hand... It is chivalrous to ask her how she feels about physical intimacy and gauge whether or not she's ready to go further, but sometimes you have to rely on your instincts. There's no need to map out where you're going to kiss her next. If she wants to be kissed, you'll know -- and if you're wrong, you'll probably just get a taste of her cheek.

Insecurity
A large part of shyness can stem from insecurity, which is a major turnoff for many women. Your lack of confidence can reflect itself in your coyness. Let's be honest: how many egomaniacs do you know that are shy? ( Anyone? Anyone? ) If you don't have the confidence to approach people and initiate conversations, can you imagine how many possibilities for romance you're missing out on? And why would a woman -- or man for that matter -- want to talk to a guy who doesn't think he is all that interesting himself? There is a fine line between confidence and ****iness though, and you have to make sure not to cross it.

Needs a caretaker
No woman wants a guy that she has to worry about when she's out with her friends or in any social situation, nor wants to be a guide every time they get intimate.

Say goodbye to mr. shy guy

So you know that your shyness might be turning women off; well, here are some tips on getting over your bashfulness. If you're strictly reserved when a girl is in the picture but outgoing overall, then your coyness will probably subside as the relationship progresses. Once you gradually break out of your shell, your new attitude will surely seep into every area of your life.

Becoming a more socially outgoing person might seem scary for a guy who has known no other way, but chances are you've wanted to get over your shyness before.

Work on your confidence
Being more extroverted could in turn make you appear more outgoing (without being obnoxious), but you have to start from the inside out. Making your self-esteem pour through your actions and attitude will be easy once you know how much you have to offer. Show yourself how great you are by making a self-worth checklist, citing all your accomplishments, the character traits you love about yourself, and the greatest moments in your life. Once you do an inventory check on how much you have to offer, it could help your pride shine through.

Be friendly to everyone
Whether you're shy when it comes to women or timid with just about every stranger, take baby steps by being sociable with everyone. Talk about the weather with a salesperson and ask your co-worker who never smiles how his day is going. Once you get used to taking initiative with the random people you come in contact with, the easier it will be to make conversation with the cute redhead at the coffee shop, and approaching people will become second nature.

Practice makes perfect
If you're shy when it comes to meeting new people and you know you'll be meeting your girlfriend's friends or family on a given weekend, go over some conversation topics that you can discuss and get yourself psyched for small talk. You don't need to make yourself crazy by reciting your spiel in front of a mirror -- that might only serve to make you more nervous -- but if you enter a social occasion knowing you're mentally revved and have some backup conversation tidbits to share, you'll feel more inclined to make an effort with strangers and eventually become the life of the party.

Take women off their pedestal
Maybe you'd be able to avoid looking like a bumbling, blushing fool every time you said or did something if you didn't consider her a goddess. She's not there to judge your "date" performance, and if you give yourself a reality check that women are on the same level as you, then she'll surely get the chance to see the real you and all you have to offer. Act with her as you would with your friends and have fun.

Step up to the plate

At the risk of sounding hypocritical, it is important to be yourself with women. So if you are a shy person by nature, try to get over that aspect of your life so that the ladies can see you for who you are. Rid yourself of the fear of taking risks, and take gradual steps to take more initiative in every area of your life.

If it's only women that make you feel weak, practice the aforementioned tips and remember that your biggest critic is yourself. Once you know your worth, you'll be able to show women how great you are, and make them tremble when they're out with you.

1. You call her too often

Why it will work against you: Incessant dialing is a major faux pas if you want to keep your dignity. It not only makes you look obsessive and dependent, but it can downright annoy her. If you are always on the other end of the phone, you lose your aura of mystery and independence that can be so intriguing.

What to do instead: For every two to three times you call her, she should be calling you at least once. Because of the old-world rules of courtship, you will inevitably be calling more often, but you should still make sure the calls are going both ways. Also, don't call during work hours or on Friday or Saturday nights.

2. You cry

Why it will work against you: You've heard time and time again that she wants a sensitive man, so you open the tear ducts every time she's around. Wrong. Crying makes you look too emotional and needy, possibly even unstable. She wants to be with someone who has an aura of strength and the capacity to protect her. But if you are constantly crying, your manly image is gone. Not to mention the annoyance factor: If you cry in public, she could be embar****ed, and that's the worst offense you can commit.

What to do instead: Unless something very tragic happened and your tears are genuine, ditch the crying act. Being sensitive to her needs is important, tears are not.

3. You give her too much PDA

Why it will work against you: Rule No. 1: Never do anything to embar**** her publicly. And serenading, ogling and smooching her in public might do just that. Not only will she consider breaking up with you over it, she might also get pressure from friends and family to do so. The last thing you want is a bad rep with her crew as being possessive, cheesy or just plain silly.

What to do instead: Some women do indeed like a certain degree of PDA, but walk that line with care. Start with a peck in public and judge her reaction before proceeding to the public serenade.

4. You use baby talk and try to be cute
Why it will work against you: It is cheesy, kitschy, silly, nausea-inducing. Need I say more? Baby talk is for babies, so don't do it to her.

What to do instead: You are allowed to have the odd pet name and cute inside joke, but leave it at that. Unless she baby talks to you first and gives you a strong indication that she likes that kind of thing, do yourself a favor and ditch it entirely.

5. You are too accommodating

Why it will work against you: Yes, it's important to let her pick the movie once in a while. But if you are watching Dirty Dancing for the 11th time, you have a problem. While you need to be accommodating to some extent, you don't want to appear spineless. In particular, don't ask her permission to do things; that produces a mother-child dynamic, which is surely not what she is looking for in a relationship.

What to do instead: Take your spine back and show her that you are capable of making a decision. Pick the movie, the restaurant or the television show once in a while. After all, that's the basis of compromise -- sometimes she decides, sometimes you do.

6. You are too close with her family and friends

Why it will work against you: While she wants you to be friendly with her family and friends, she doesn't want you to jump the gun either. Especially in the early stages of a relationship, she'll want to make sure things are working between the two of you before bringing her family and friends into the mix.

What to do instead: Your relationship with her family and friends is something that has to develop over time. Be cordial and friendly, but don't go planning her brother's birthday party if you've only been together for a month.

7. You groom excessively

Why it will work against you: A woman generally doesn't want a man to spend more time grooming than she does. But perhaps more importantly, too much grooming will take away from your rugged, relaxed sex appeal. And believe me, that's so much more sexy on a man than a manicure.

What to do instead: Make sure you are clean and smell good, but ease up the facials and manicures; your sex appeal will skyrocket.

8. You profess your love for her prematurely or too often

Why it will work against you: I know you probably think that the way to a woman's heart is through an "I love you." And you are not completely off base. But such a declaration made too early (or too often) will only freak her out. Not only that, but it puts you in an awfully vulnerable position if she doesn't say it back.

What to do instead: There is a time and place for everything. Don't say it because you think it will impress her; only say it when you mean it. And please, limit yourself to saying it a few times a week.

9. You "overdance"

Why it will work against you: Do you say things like, "I love to dance," or, "Let's go dancing tonight"? When she wants to leave a nightclub, do you find yourself saying, "Just one more song"? If you commit any of these offenses, then you are most certainly are overdancer. You are the extreme opposite of the "I don't dance" kind of guy and you are risking not being taken seriously. She might think you are avoiding buying her a drink or conversing with her at the bar. If all that is not enough, consider this: An overdancer tends to be smelly and sweaty by the end of the night.

What to do instead: Don't look so eager. She'll want you to dance some of the time, but you don't have to always be the instigator. Try to judge when she wants to dance and initiate dancing only half of the time. And don't forget to take breaks to buy her drinks.

10. You talk constantly

Why it will work against you: You might be a great talker, but if you can't be silent with her sometimes, then you need to listen up. Your incessant blabber is bound to annoy her sooner or later. Scratch that; it's probably already annoying her.

What to do instead: Although you've been taught to think that women like men who can talk and share, it goes both ways. Make sure you leave the floor open for her to talk too. Ask questions and don't forget to listen. And remember: sometimes silence is golden.

1. She says she's not ready for a relationship

Ah, the classic escape route; women often use this one when they feel cornered by someone they are not interested in. It's clean, requires no preparation and leaves no room for a counterargument. But if a woman says this to you, what she really means is that she does not want to be in a relationship with you. For whatever reason, she doesn't see you as relationship material for her, so don't stick around hoping she will be ready someday. She might get into a relationship eventually, but it probably won't be with you.

2. You're always the one calling her and/or she doesn't return your phone calls

Watch out: She may be avoiding you. And if she's not avoiding you, you are not on her mind and she simply forgot. Either way, this means that she has less invested than you do and doesn't care enough to actively seek out your company.

Here's a rule of thumb: If she doesn't return your first call, call a second time, as she may be playing hard-to-get. If she doesn't return your second call, you can rightly conclude that she's not into you. (Do allow a certain amount of leeway on this point; women have been told by umpteen dating books to let the man do the pursuing. She should be calling you at least once for every three times you call her.)

3. She avoids eye contact and physical proximity

This is an obvious sign that many men overlook. If she is attracted to you, she will naturally want to be close to you and make eye contact. If she is evading your gaze, however, she may be consciously trying to avoid leading you on and having to turn down your advances later. It's a sneaky little trick, but it usually works. Take it as a sign that you're not her type. If she keeps you at arm's length at all times, she may also be protecting her personal space, so make sure you don't get too close.

4. She mentions other guys she finds attractive

No, she's probably not trying to make you jealous -- unless we are dealing with an ex-girlfriend, a situation that belongs in another category altogether. Most likely, though, you are in the "friend zone," which means that you are just like one of her girlfriends that she shares her thoughts with. Ergo, it has never even crossed her mind to date you. Not good.

5. She tries to set you up with another woman

She might do this because, like in signal No. 4, it never crossed her mind to date you. Alternatively, she might do this because she likes you as a friend but wants to make certain you don't hit on her. Either way, the message is clear: She definitely doesn't want you for herself.

6. She doesn't laugh at your jokes

If she is consistently stone-faced when you crack jokes, then you can conclude two important things. First, she doesn't find your sense of humor engaging, and second, she doesn't like you enough to bother to pretend otherwise. Here's a shocker: Whether or not she laughs at your jokes doesn't necessarily have to do with whether or not she finds them funny. Laughing is a form of flirting, and if she isn't doing it, you can be pretty sure her mind isn't on you.

7. She is always vague about making plans

If she really wants to see you, she'll make firm plans. If she doesn't want to see you or doesn't care one way or another, you can be pretty sure that she's not into you. If she is vague about making plans, it probably means that she is neutral about being in your company, or even worse, that she doesn't want to commit in case something better comes up. Ouch.

8. She regularly cancels plans with you

Let me break it to you gently: You are the fall guy, the "just in case she doesn't have anything better to do" guy. It is certainly fair to cancel plans occasionally for a legitimate reason, but if she bails consistently, ditch her, even as a friend. If she does this, it not only shows that she's not interested, but that she holds little respect for you at all. Move on, and do it quickly.

9. Her description of the perfect man sounds nothing like you

She tells you she wants a Mediterranean man who can dance salsa. You are Swedish and can only square dance. I know -- women rarely stick to what they say are the perfect traits they are looking for in a man. And indeed, she may actually end up with a square-dancing Swede, but in all likelihood, it won't be with you. Take this as a kind hint on her part that you, for whatever reason, are not her perfect man.

1- Keep conversations short
Whether you are a busy corporate attorney, self-employed or even unemployed, you always want to give her the impression that you lead a full, active life. By keeping your initial telephone conversations brief, you will give her the impression that you are busy and in demand. As an added bonus, if you are always the one ending the conversations, it will keep you in a position of control, leaving her wanting more and more of your time.

2- Leave on a high note
She'll always remember what you said last. Therefore, before ending a conversation, make an effort to leave on a positive note, such as with a well thought-out joke or a funny story. Even if your entire telephone conversation went poorly, if you leave her smiling before saying goodbye, she is more likely to want to speak to you again -- and hopefully see you in person -- which, of course, is your ultimate goal.

3- Have a purpose to your call
Don't just call to chitchat. We cannot stress this enough: preparation, preparation, preparation. Be armed and ready with a purpose to your call (the most likely purpose being to ask her out, of course); this will give her the impression that you are assertive and thoughtful enough to think of a plan beforehand. This plan will also serve as a backup weapon should there be an awkward silence in the conversation or if her voice mail picks up.

4- Be positive
Women might have the reputation of being natural listeners, but the truth is that she probably won't stick around if you're all about gloom and negativity. It doesn't matter if your boss is disrespectful or your coworker is incompetent -- complaints are a real turn off, especially in the early stages of a relationship. You can avoid looking needy by keeping your emotional baggage to yourself, at least at the beginning. Make a concerted effort to keep all conversations positive and the griping to a minimum.

5- Leave a message only on the second call
You should avoid leaving a message on the first call; it may make you seem too needy. Herein lies perhaps the most important, and least flexible, of all the rules: Do not think that you will bypass her radar by calling from an unknown number or hanging up on her machine numerous times. If she doesn't answer your first call, feel free to hang up without leaving a message and try again later. Upon the second phone call, leave a message, and don't call again until she does. By not calling more than twice, you not only avoid the dreaded appearance of desperation, but you also throw the ball into her court and get the chance to gauge her interest in you (by seeing when or if she calls you back).

6- Place the call at an appropriate time
Phone calls during working hours are a complete no-no. First, you'll be busted for daydreaming about her on the job -- if you take time off from work to call her, she'll know she's very much on your mind. Secondly, she might not be as receptive to your phone call with her coworkers or boss in her midst. If you'd like to set up a date for the weekend, call by Wednesday. Avoid Friday and Saturday night phone calls at all cost; even if you are at home with your dog watching a movie, she doesn't need to know that.

7- Leave coherent messages
Don't leave long, rambling messages on her voice mail. Picture this: Every message you leave on her voice mail could potentially be played back and analyzed several times over. Your tone and choice of wording could be used as points of discussion with her friends. Therefore, your best defense against a disastrous message is brevity. Identify yourself by name (especially in the early stages of getting to know her, don't just say: "It's me!"), then get to the point (for example, ask her if she is available on Friday). Leave one phone number where you can be reached, but don't leave your contact number, address, e-mail, and so on -- this will just seem too desperate.

Level of attention

Flirtation thats just flirtation will tend to be flippant and fun. Friends who dont harbor a real attraction for one another will play, and then move on to the next thing. They have nothing invested because there are no feelings involved. If a gesture or a touch is prolonged, however, it could mean that shes trying to get your attention to push things farther than the status quo. When flirtation is exaggerated like this, it could also mean shes enjoying it so much that she doesnt want to let you slip away, which is also an indication that theres something else behind it. There is a fine defining line between these two levels of play, and people tend to differ on what they expect of flirtation, but youll likely notice if somebody gives you this extra bit of attention.

Exclusivity

Some women are just flirty. If shes scooting around giving everybody in the vicinity a wink and a nudge, theres likely nothing special in the look she throws your way. In other words, if she uses casual flirting vs. true affection, theres probably nothing more behind it. If, on the other hand, she pays special attention to you, theres a good chance youve been singled out for a reason. If its not in her nature to flirt with just anybody, she may be trying to communicate how she really feels about you. Used this way, flirtation is a way to feel you out before putting herself on the line.

Intensity

The key to friendly flirtation is lightheartedness and subtlety. Two people who flirt often will likely have a rhythm to their interactions; its like a routine. This type of play has underlying and unsaid boundaries that maintain a friendly feel. If her flirting suddenly becomes more intense, however, it could indicate deeper feelings.

Eye contact

Eye language is a very important indicator of the feelings between two individuals; it's a great way to tell the difference between flirting vs. true affection. Think of how you interact with your friends, male or female. Most of the time, eye contact is made during face-to-face conversation, but it is casual and frequently broken over the course of the exchange. If she makes prolonged and sustained eye contact, on the other hand, it could mean that something beyond friendship is afoot. Another indicator is if she mirrors your body language while you talk, extending the sense of closeness you both feel.

These types of actions -- whether theyre performed consciously or not -- could mean that shes trying to catch your eye in a romantic sense. Shes probably hoping youll notice her as something more than a fun friend.

Duration

Flirtation is something thats fun and entertaining, but if it isnt serious, it usually passes with time. Because there are no true feelings wrapped up in the friendly sort of flirting, a love em and leave em rule tends to govern these actions. If, on the other hand, the two of you have been flirting consistently for an extended period of time and its not waning, its possible that there are deeper feelings behind it.

Think back on how your relationship has evolved. Is she still seeking you out after youve moved to new flirting grounds? If so, its likely that shes trying to linger in this type of activity until she can get her real feelings of attraction across. Not only can this indicate existing feelings of interest, but prolonged flirtation with a single person can also lead to them, so tread carefully in both instances.

Intimacy

Flirting involves a broad range of activities, from conversation and mockery to gestures and touch. These actions can either be playful or extend to a more personal level. If flirtation began at -- or has progressed to -- a more intimate level than most friendships, you can take a hint that theres probably more to it.

For instance, conversation between friends can get flirty, but if she tells you personal things or asks you questions that reach a more emotional level, shes probing beyond the scope of friendship, and its likely that shes interested in pursuing a relationship. This is a good test of whether she's flirting vs. true attraction. Likewise, if you go beyond an arm brush to holding hands or hugging, you have reached the next emotional level, which can indicate interest beyond friendship alone.

No books

What it says: No brains

Join a book of the month club and have pre-selected literature arrive at your doorstep or subscribe to a magazine or two in your areas of interest to provide good conversation-starting opportunities. If you have a variety of non-fiction and fiction books, and a melange of magazines, what your place says about you is that you're well-rounded and well-versed. Alternatively, pick up a few classics that you were supposed to read in college, but never got around to if you're looking for a traditional vibe. For even more impact, stop by a used book store and pick up some well-worn copies of books that look like they've actually been around for awhile and read a few times so that she won't think to question whether or not you've actually cracked them open -- unless it's a favorite of hers and just loves to talk about it.

Dirty bathroom

What it says: Poor hygiene

Do you know what your place says about you if you have a dirty bathroom? If the place you go to get clean is a disaster, she might end up questioning just how sanitary it would be to get close to you -- not a good thing at all. You need to keep the basic three pillars of bathrooms in mind when you're tidying up.

• Surfaces should be clean. Keep the counter and floor mopped and cl**tter free.
• Keep a tidy toilet. Women actually need to make contact with it so be generous and give it a wipe. If she has to squat, she isn't coming back.
• Soap and towels are essentials. It's a scientific fact that women are more likely to wash their hands, so make sure there is good soap by the sink and clean towels available -- if you aren't going to use them, she is.

Stocked kitchen (cookbooks, utensils)

What it says: Knowledge of domestic skills

Want to know what your place says about you if you have a bar kitchen? Lots! But don't worry; plenty of department stores offer start-up kitchen kits that will give you all the basics to get set up with a matching set of the most-used items vital to all kitchen endeavors. Don't feel like you have to get a ton of recipes, just pick up one or two well-rounded cookbooks -- one all purpose (like the Joy of Cooking) and one specialty (like Latin dishes or pasta) or have some hand-written family recipes that have been tested and recommended. Some overlooked items that will also give the air of kitchen familiarity can be simple dollar-store purchases like oven mitts, tea towels and a cork screw.

Sports memorabilia versus sports equipment

What it says: Armchair athlete

An extensive memorabilia collection is a foreign concept to most women, so that wall display of college basketball caps won't be as impressive to her as it is to your buddies. For every piece of memorabilia it's a good idea to have an actual piece of usable sporting equipment so that you don't come off looking like a spectator rather than the buff physical guy that you are or would like her to think you are. The exception is of course your smelly hockey bag, which shouldn't be on display -- think inline skates or a basketball instead.

Mementos of previous relationships

What it says: An attachment to the past means you aren't available for her

Want to know what your place says about you if you have mementos of previous relationships in your home? No, you don't. This one is pretty simple: Pictures of exes are a big no-no and should be cleared out of sight. The same goes for that Mexican blanket you and the ex picked up on your last trip or gifts that are still hanging around long after a relationship has ended. If the items are purely decoration and can only be rationalized as sentimental, keep them out of sight. If they are functional, like a sofa you love and can't afford to replace, don't volunteer it's origin until after your lady is established as a girlfriend and has gotten the run-down on your exes. Whatever you do, don't lie about the identities of females in pictures that you do keep around; it will only be awkward later on when she learns their true identities.

Plants or other living things

What it says: Able to nurture something other than yourself

Since her good impression will die if your living things seem to be on the brink of extension, pick up some greenery that will always looked well-cared for, such as a cactus or small indoor tree (both of which are less demanding than *la*hming plants or animals). If you have pets that are picky about visitors, have a plan to keep them in another part of the house so they don't scare her or enroll in an obedience class to ensure well-behaved meetings between your lady and your devoted companions. It's important that she isn't uncomfortable and misbehaving pets will only give her the idea that you aren't able to adequately look after your charges.

Pictures of family or tokens from your childhood

What it says: You have a good head on your shoulders and are reasonably well-adjusted

Want to know what your place says about you if you have family pics hanging around? A pristine home devoid of any references to your past will leave her wondering what you are hiding, so endeavoring to add a few touches of your life before you met her that don't include snaps of you and your 10 best friends drunk on spring break or you and an ex passionately kissing under the Mexican sunsetsays you're sensitive and caring. At least one family picture should do the trick, and failing that, try framing pictures of just you at important times during your life, like a life-altering trip or at a graduation. If you have young family members that gift you with hand-made cards or ashtrays from summer camp, feel free to display them, she'll love that your reminders of family are more important than aesthetics.

Big screen TV, a Nintendo, Playstation and an Xbox

What it says: You have too much free time and a penchant for your younger years

Even if your living room turns into Saturday-night game zone for you and the guys, take the time to tidy the area up a bit, and perhaps put the game consoles away in a media storage unit when not in use. One is fine, but three will come across as obsessive and she won't believe you when you say it's a rare plaything if everything is out, hooked up and the controllers are right next to your fave chair.

Things hanging on the walls such as artwork or pictures

What it says: You're settled and your surroundings are important to you

You don't need to spend a fortune to look settled. Just putting old posters into frames before hanging them is often enough to take away the whiff of college decor. Those stolen Stop signs nabbed during a drunken night out in college and your extensive beer mat collection might send the wrong signal to a future conquest, so stick to more universal themes of art or architecture to make sure you look a little cultured and classy. If that isn't your style, try getting large prints of vacation destinations to highlight where you've been and give you built-in conversation topics.

Well-stocked fridge

What it says: Self-sufficiency

If your fridge only has beer and condiments, with eight boxes of cereal on top of it, your visitor might get the idea that you either eat out a lot, eat poorly or are unaccustomed to guests. It doesn't take much to throw a variety of fruit in a bowl on the counter or have some basics like eggs, toast and the makings of a salad to offer her if her visit extends beyond the evening. Empty pizza boxes and take-out containers might signal convenience to you, but to her it will only remind her that fine dining is a rarity, if not a complete non-issue.

WE often hear a number of myths surrounding the vagina, but many of us never take the time to learn the truth surrounding this very important body part.

Here are some important facts that many persons -- including women themselves -- may not have known.

Things cant get lost inside.

FACT 1. The vagina cleans itself.

FACT 2. The average depth of a vagina is between three to six inches.

FACT 3. Orgasm relieves menstrual cramps: Having an orgasm relieves menstrual cramps because the vigorous muscle action moves *lo** and other fluids away from congested organs. According to gynaecologist Dr Monique Rainford, "If a woman has an orgasm during her menses, it can relieve cramps and other menstrual pains".

FACT 4. Women are more sexually aroused at menstruation: Dr Errol Daley, gynaecologist at Gynae Associates, said majority of women, although they find it aesthetically displeasing, are more inclined to have sex during their periods, as it is around this time that they are most aroused. "The reason for that may be hormonal or psychological," he said.

FACT 5. Sex won't stretch the vagina: The vagina is incredibly elastic and can fit a supersized penis, yet it always returns to its usual tightness after sex. However, it might be a different story after childbirth, as some women tend to feel looser. Certain exercises, eg, the kegel exercise, can tighten the muscles.

FACT 6. Not having sex won't tighten the vagina: Some persons say the longer you take to have sex, the tighter the vagina will be. This is not true. While the vaginal muscles may be tense at first, penetration gradually loosens it.

FACT 7. The vagina can be exercised: Just as working your biceps firms up your arms, working the main muscle of your pubic region can tone up your vagina. Besides giving you a tighter grip during sex, it also may make it easier to climax. Exercising the muscles means clamping down as if you're stopping your urine flow, hold for 10 seconds, then release. Two sets of 10 to 20 a day will give you noticeable difference in two months.

FACT 8. All vaginas smell: Every vagina has a smell. It tends to be acidic before your period and pungent afterwards. The scent tends to be more noticeable after a workout, because of sweat glands, and during sex, because of the natural lubrication that it produces.

FACT 9. Things can't get lost inside: For persons interested in experimenting with objects and fruits during sex, remember that it's impossible for anything (including tampons) to escape into your uterus since the cervix blocks off access. If it slips out of reach, try fishing it out while squatting and bearing down. However, stay clear of putting food (eg chocolate syrup or whipped cream) up there. The sugar can lead to an infection.

YOU just can't put your finger on it, but you have the feeling that something is not right. If you have one of those uneasy sensations, then you could be on to something. If your man is sending off some strange vibes, pay keen attention, he could be keeping secrets from you. Here are some clues that could help you figure things out.

1. He takes his phone calls in another room

When his brethren calls him, he bellows at the top of his lungs discussing the latest happenings, but then he gets that certain phone call and suddenly the television is too loud. He has to step outside to take the call. If your antennae are not up yet, then you are way too trusting.

2. He's defensive

You ask an innocent question regarding his activity and it becomes grounds for a big argument. Right away he starts accusing you of being too possessive and inquisitive. Ever heard the expression, "The best form of defence is attack?"

3. He is too prepared

If your man has all the right answers to questions you haven't even voiced yet, look out, you are dealing with a real pro. If he has all his moves planned to the last detail, it just means he doesn't want to be leaving a trail.

4. He doesn't meet your eyes

If you're having a discussion with him and he can't meet your eyes, something is wrong. It could be that guilt is tearing him apart, or he is afraid you will see the truth in his eyes. If your man's eyes are all over the place and not meeting yours, it's time to start sniffing!

5. He's too attentive

Suddenly, he is super attentive. Your wish is his command. He starts taking home presents and little gifts for you. It's not your birthday, and it's not your anniversary... hello, someone wants to ease his conscience!

6. He is more amorous

Being close to you and keeping you distracted is a sure way to prevent you from prying too much. Besides, that sure beats conversation which could lead to him giving away more than he wants to!

7. He doesn't leave a trail

If there's nothing to hide, he won't be thinking about erasing every number he has called from his phone. If he uses the Internet and erases his surfing history, if his computer is password protected, there could be something worth checking out.

8. He's acting edgy

This is the clearest sign that he is keeping something close to his chest. If his whole body language and actions spells uncomfortable, so much so that your instinct has kicked in that something is not right, then go with your intuition.

IN our society, people share beliefs and opinions about many topics and sex happens to be one of them. Some beliefs are truthful, but evidently, others are fictional.

Myth #1:

Blue b***s

Answer: Actually, this term refers to the unpleasant feeling of unrelieved vasocongestion within the male genital area. This is due to the arteries and veins carrying *lo** to and from the genital area becoming enlarged and constricted. This results in an uneven *lo** flow that causes the testicles to become gorged with *lo** and increase in their size by 25-50 per cent. Aching, heaviness and discomfort in the testicles may be due to vasocongestion. Blue b***s get its name from the bluish tint that may appear when *lo** engorges the *lo** vessels in the testicles. Ejaculation is a quick way to overcome this ailment, but being patient is also effective, as 'blue b***s' will ware off on its own.

Myth #2:

Having sex in water prevents pregnancy

Answer: This statement is truly a myth. There is very little in water that can kill sperm or prevent a female from getting pregnant. The sperm are on a 'mission', and that mission is to fertilise an egg but sadly, water will not stop them. Abstinence just makes sense.

Myth #3:

If a lizard jumps on you, you're pregnant.

Answer: This statement is not only very illogical, it is also false.

Myth #4:

If a victim of HIV or any other STI has sexual intercourse with a virgin he/she will become cured.

Answer: There is no truths to this statement. An individual plagued with Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) -- or any other STI (sexually transmitted infections) -- cannot and will not become cured by having unprotected sex with a virgin. A virgin is a person who has never had sexual intercourse. A victim of HIV is a person with a viral infection within their immune system, and as a result, it weakens that person's ability to ward of sicknesses. All that will come from an attempt at fulfilling this myth is dramatically increasing the 'virgin's' chances of contracting HIV.

Myth #5:

You can't get pregnant during unprotected sex if the man pulls out before he ejaculates.

Answer: Even if your boyfriend doesn't ejaculate, there can still be sperm in his pre-cum (the clear fluid that is released when he is aroused). It only takes one sperm to get you pregnant. That fluid can also contain STIs.

Myth #6:

Peeing after sex washes out sperm and prevents pregnancy

Answer: For a start, urine exits the bladder through the urethra, which lies in above the vaginal opening. Which means any sperm in the vagina won't even get wet when you wee.

Myth #7:

It is safer to have sex during the period cycle

Answer: There's a chance that you can get pregnant during a period, particularly towards the end of your menstrual cycle. Unprotected sex also increases the risk infection by STIs. The huge problem with the 'rhythm method' is that few monthly cycles are absolutely regular, especially in teenagers, and so the day the egg is actually released is unpredictable. It may happen earlier or later in the cycle than expected.

EVER heard the saying that men like a lady in the streets but a freak in the sheets? It's every man's dream a woman who can show the world class, yet wow him by being a tiger in the romance department.

"Think dirty... think dirty all the time," advised Orlando Scott, a marketing expert. "When you're able to meet all his needs for variety, he'll have no problem being yours, and yours only."

Here are some tips for getting your man weak to the point where he will have you on his mind, all day, everyday.

1. Tease him and leave him. It's occasionally advised that you don't give in every time he pushes you for some loving. But let him think he'll get what he wants, get him hot, then leave him hanging while you rush off to do some 'urgent' laundry or shopping.

2. Call him up for a lunch-time quickie when you know he's trying to meet a deadline for some important project. Believe us when we say that project or no, deadline or not, he'll come running when you call.3. Flirt with him throughout the day. When he's in a meeting, alleviate his boredom by sending him a half-naked photo of you. Then tease him with texts about what a fine behind he has, and make him blush while his boss blathers on.

4. Give him love bites and watch him try to cover them up, or try to explain them away to his friends.

5. Tell him you have no reservations and he can do whatever he wants with you while you're both at dinner in a crowded restaurant. The innocence of the surroundings and the total shock factor of what you say will floor him.

6. Tease his nipples and his belly button, often ignored sensory parts of a man's body. When you do that, watch him promise you the world.

The key to thinking dirty is to not overdo the sleaze factor, but to catch your man when he least expects it. That's what makes it fun and leaves him wanting and hoping for more.

WHILE many men get aroused fairly quickly and without much stimulation, women take longer to get going. Many men don't understand this, and so there are many women who have yet to experience the thrill of getting their moan zones covered by their men.

If you're one of those women, show this page to your man so he understands how to reach for the less-than-obvious body parts and ensure your satisfaction.

The nape of her neck

 

Though very few men focus on the nape of the woman's neck, gently touching and kissing this area will make her reach dizzying heights of pleasure. This part is also the best place to start kissing if you still have your clothes on and you want to tell her how much you want her at that moment.

Her collarbone

 

Unbutton her shirt just a little and stimulate her collarbone with your touch. Create circles with your tongue and give her love bites there, just to tease and remind her of how much you want her.

The small of her back

 

Place gentle kisses and stroke your tongue down the small of her back and down her spine. It will definitely get her in the mood for more.

Behind her knees

 

Behind the knees are packed with sensitive nerve endings, so you can gently caress the back of her knee under her skirt while the two of you are in a public space as it is sure to get her excited by the time you get home.

The palms of her hands

 

Believe it or not, this is a very sensitive area on a woman. Run your fingers along her palm as that will make her feel relaxed and ready for the sexy rendezvous ahead. Then make small circles there and watch her eyelids dilate with passion.

Her earlobes

 

Touching, kissing and even gently biting her earlobes will send her into a sexual frenzy, as this is one of the most erogenous moan centres on a woman's body. If you want to excite her even more, simply nibble around the outside of the rest of her ear as well, but don't put your tongue inside her ear. That's a major turn-off for some women.

Foot massage

 

There's nothing more seductive than a foot massage. It will help her relax, while getting her in that ready mood. Add some massage oil or lotion to the mix and you will have her weak. Try adding light kisses to the mix and have her moaning.

Her inner thighs

 

Touching a woman's inner thighs without touching her private parts is the most sensual tease that is sure to get her all charged up. Employ your hands and mouth to caress and kiss. The excitement that women get when touched in this area is mostly because of the many nerve endings found there.

Her breasts

 

Most men are already aware that next to the vagina, probably the most sexual part of a woman's body are her breasts. Women like their breasts to be gently fondled and gently squeezed. Licking and sucking on the nipples turn women on more than you can imagine.

Her lips

 

A good kisser can turn a woman on by kissing her gently, then long and hard. Kissing tells her how much you want and need her.

Many people think that a healthy marriage as an important part of sex. Such behavior not only to satisfy their own sexual purposes. It is about effective communication and intimacy. Many women claim that they often felt at her husband, are the lack of intimacy. Lack of marital intimacy often requires a few mental and physical integrity. Her sexual frustration can also lead to stress, anxiety, low self-esteem.

side on the other, couples, which is carried out regularly, a report on the activities of a more happy marriage and a close partner. Happiness expert Dr. Robert Holden said , sex is not only the biological behavior of desire or necessity. Sex is a unique form of communication and intimacy. According to Dr. Horton: I think our relationship with large know a mistake, we do not provide us with the best energy, the most important person. He , married partners are Nuli you an emotional attachment to a welcome Pingheng sex life.

But why some couples with their sex life in difficulty. According to experts, marriage, gender-related issues, just normal. Common gender couples, some of the boredom, lack of intimacy, low libido, sexual and emotional.

Another possible cause of frustration could be because the man could not meet the expectations among the female partners. One reason for the low testosterone levels is that some people have poor sexual performance. Testosterone is a steroid hormone that boost the production of sperm and male reproductive systems, sexual desire and development in the energy sector, and the immune system needs. In addition to its important sexual health, AIDS, this hormone, many male characteristics such as muscle development, hair patterns and voice modulation. Reducing male testosterone production is a natural aging process. This decline in production can lead to low libido, often fatigue, depression, and energy. Low testosterone levels can lead to sexual dysfunction, osteoporosis, muscle loss and mood swings.

testosterone different alternatives that help many people stay in the *lo** of the normal level of testosterone can. These treatments can be at different doses, can be by injection, patch, gel will be administered, and pills. Testosterone injections are usually in their buttocks. Two popular products are injected testosterone enanthate of testosterone cypionate and testosterone. The former is injected every 3-4 weeks while the latter is given every 4 weeks. How many intramuscular injections, these injections can be painful, usually by people trained in Health Care Management.

mirrors and once daily. They are mostly clean, back, arms, abdomen or thighs dry skin. These products are not designed to be used directly for the genitals. You should also broken or the patch, oily or stimulate the skin gel is avoided. Testosterone undecanoate capsules with another way to increase testosterone levels in the *lo**. Many of testosterone pills safe to use because they are made from natural raw materials. These tablets should not chew and swallow.

the treatment of low testosterone should not be taken without prior consultation with the professional associations in health. Strongly recommended that men talk to doctors or other medical experts and weigh the benefits and low testosterone treatment drugs and disadvantages. Another priority should be to a healthy lifestyle, including good food to eat to keep up often in sports, and have enough sleep. Men should seek to improve their sexual performance and their partners in close communication and cooperation between the women the feeling of food. In the frequent improvement of sexual function and sexual can deepen and strengthen the partnership between couples and the bonds of love in the marriage of physical intimacy This is the nature of the ultimate goa

HOW COMES SUM MEN CAN CUM AND GO AGAIN BUT SOME MEN NEED A 20 MIN BREAK INBETWEEN ???????? .......and say wha u do

LOOK MI INA MI RAAS FACE AN TELL MI THIS NUH TELL MI IT NUH RAAS LUU !!! UNU MAN A HYPOCRITE  NUH WATCH DI RESPONSE DEM NOW....

If so, we want to know:

SO it's done, at least for him it is, and you are like, 'Okay, that was quick!' This is the reaction of the woman whose partner is experiencing premature ejaculation, which can be a humiliating and awkward issue for the couple.

Premature ejaculation is the inability to exercise control over the ejaculatory process. There is no determined cause -- it may be psychological, or caused by other problems like infections, hormone or thyroid problems, or others.

 

Treating the problem may require anything from drugs to psychological help, and as his partner, it's important for a woman to also do all she can to help.

Here are a few tips:

1. Take the initiative to resolve the issue without hurting your partner's feelings. He might not want to say to you that he has a problem but you both know that he does, so you will have to start figuring out how you will help him.

2. Talk about it. But be careful how you do this. You do not want make him angry or hurt so as to worsen his situation. Be as calm and loving as possible when you bring it up. Let him know he need not be embar****ed because it is just between you and him and you are only trying to improve the sexual experience for both of you.

3. You have to be willing to work with your partner to restore and enhance his sexual potency. You cannot tell him 'do this and do that' and not be there to do it with him. Anything he needs to try, you have to try it with him.

4. You must help him choose the right medication. Premature ejaculation may be successfully treated with certain antidepressant drugs, which may have the side effect of increasing the time taken to ejaculate. There are medical ways to help this problem, let him know you will support him in getting help.

5. Reassure your partner that you love all of his touching and kissing. He is facing something that is very likely ruining his confidence and decapitating his ego. Many rapid ejaculators see themselves as being sexual failures in the eyes of their partners and will worry about it. To overcome his problem, he will need a confidence boost.

6. Help him relax. If your man is tense, it might result in him being the 'one-minute man' you have come to know. Taking a bath with him before intercourse could help to make him more relaxed.

7. Gently discourage a rush to intercourse and encourage him to explore your body in many ways. If needed and desired, encourage him to stimulate you to orgasm in other ways. If you have already climaxed before intercourse begins, some of the pressure is taken off your partner.

8. Change positions. Encourage him to try sexual positions with you that will make him more comfortable. The man-on-top position usually means he has to balance his weight on his arms and as such he might lose control or awareness of his arousal and his ejaculation. Woman-on-top is usually more effective in giving him more control to last longer.

9. Finally, he is your man, and for your pleasure and his ego, you want to make it right. So just remember this will not go away in a day or night but will mean some give and take and a lot of patience on your part.

Source: Jamaica Observer

WHILE many potential parents figure that the sex of a baby is purely a surprise given by nature, others, especially those who subscribe to a famous researcher's beliefs, see much possibility for couples to decide on whether they get a girl or boy baby, rather than leaving things up to chance.

Though many gynaecologists do not share the belief, studies done by Dr Landrum Shettles, considered to be one of the most influential fertility experts in the United States, found that deciding on the gender of a baby is possible by using the 'Shettles method'.

In this method, it was found that men produce two types of sperm -- the X (female) and Y (male). According to Dr Shettles, the Y-sperm are smaller, weaker, but faster than their siblings' X-sperm, which are bigger, stronger, but slower, yet more resilient and able to survive for longer once released. As a result, by carefully timing intercourse in relation to ovulation, couples should theoretically be able to use this difference to their advantage.

Local obstetrician and gynaecologist at the University Hospital of the West Indies Professor Horace Fletcher, said this theory has not been proven, and there is no easy way to predict the conception of a boy or girl.

"There is no need really to pre-empt nature," Professor Fletcher said. "Take what you get and make the best person of him or her. Doing all this stuff just leads to resentment of your child. Love your children -- male or female."

But we figure Dr Shettle's suggestions couldn't hurt, and they are outlined below

Conception of a boy

For the conception of a boy, Dr Shettles recommends the following:

* Abstain from sex during the four or five days leading up to ovulation as this will help to build up your partner's sperm count.

* Have sex as close to ovulation as possible, ideally on the day of ovulation itself as this is a woman's most fertile time. As the Y-sperm are more nimble, when released just prior to ovulation they will reach and fertilise an egg much sooner than their X counterparts are able.

* The optimum vaginal environment for Y-sperm to thrive in is the alkalinity of the 'egg white' cervical mucus present just before ovulation. As Y-sperm are more fragile, they are less able to survive in more acidic conditions, hence the reason for having sex as close to ovulation as possible. Alkalinity is increased during the female orgasm so Dr Shettles recommends having one before, or at the same time as your partner if you want to conceive a boy. What's more the female reproductive system contracts during and after orgasm which gives the Y-sperm a helping hand in making their way speedily to the egg.

* Have sex in a position that allows for deep penetrations (Dr Shettles recommends doggy style) as this deposits the sperm further into the vagina and nearer the cervix where the environment is more alkaline and the Y-sperm have less distance to travel.

* Men who are accustomed to wearing briefs or other tight underwear should wear loose underwear only, as the testicles need cooler temperatures for sperm to survive. Thus the Y-sperm, since they are weaker, will be helped more than the X-sperms by this method.

* Shettles recommends a nice cup of caffeinated coffee for the man, right before sex. While not clear on how or why this works, it is believed it gives the Y-sperm a jolt.

* Right before sex, the woman should bathe in a solution of water and baking soda and the man should bathe in cool water to favour Y-sperm

Conceiving a girl

For the conception of a girl, Dr Shettles recommends that you:

* Have sex as much as possible on the days leading up to ovulation but then abstain for two to three days before and on the day of ovulation itself. This works on the principle that sperm are able to survive for up to six days in the female reproductive system and that by the time ovulation occurs, only the more resilient X-sperm will remain to fertilise the egg.

* Have sex in a position that allows for shallow penetration (such as the missionary) as this deposits sperm lower in the reproductive system where the environment is less alkaline and where there is a further distance to travel, giving the X-sperm a fighting change of outlasting the Y-sperm and reaching their target intact.

* Refrain from sex during the fertile period if you are trying to conceive a girl as the female orgasm increases the alkalinity of the vaginal environment making it more friendly to Y-sperm. Dr Shettles recommends that women who have sex should not have an orgasm.

* For a girl, the man is supposed to take a hot bath immediately before intercourse. This gives the X-sperm an advantage.

* Right before sex, the woman should bathe in a solution of vinegar and water.

-- Edited by jubalson on Monday 12th of July 2010 12:26:53 PM

WE all know the standard reasons for wearing a condom -- it's an effective form of birth control and the next effective, next to abstinence, for the prevention of STDs. But condom use has even more benefits than that, and once you consider the benefits below, you may wonder why you haven't been wrapping it up after all.

1. It's less messy. Bareback sex is overrated, especially when it comes to the male orgasm. A condom allows you to spare yourself - and your sheets the mess of post-sex clean-up.

2. Condoms have lubricant. Many condoms come already lubricated, which is great for the woman who suffers from vaginal dryness. Going without condoms - in the absence of lube can make sex painful for both partners. The lubricated condom makes things easier.

3. You enjoy sex more. With unprotected sex, even if the woman is on another form of birth control, there's always the fear of pregnancy in the back of her mind, which may make her unable to relax. Condoms remove that fear, making sex more fun.

4. He will last longer. No longer will you be dissatisfied when he orgasms within minutes, as happens when many couples go bareback. Condom use ensures that he will last longer, which guarantees your satisfaction.

5. There's more variety. If you're with the same partner, things can get boring and routine. Condoms which come in many colours and varieties (ribbed etc) can give the impression of something new everyday.

6. HPV control: According to the US Centres for Disease Control and Prevention, condoms may lower the risk of HPV (Human Papilloma Virus). To be most effective, they should be used with every sex act, from start to finish. Condoms may also lower the risk of developing HPV-related diseases, such as genital warts and cervical cancer.

7. There are no side effects: Any woman on hormonal birth control will tell you that they come with a variety of side effects - from severe mood swings to constant nausea. Condoms are side-effect free.

8. Minimal cost: Condoms won't cost you an arm and a leg, neither will you have to stand in line at the pharmacy or visit your doctor to get a new dose of birth control. Condoms are available in every shop corner imaginable.