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Mediiazone Forums → MZ @ 2013 :: A Owa Endz → Funny Stuff → NEW OFFICE POLICIES
 

Topic: NEW OFFICE POLICIES

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Kenzie
Noobs
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NEW OFFICE POLICIES
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NEW OFFICE POLICIES:


Dress Code:

* You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary.

* If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise.

* If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise.

* If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.

Sick Days:

We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.

Personal Days:

Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturdays & Sundays.

Bathroom Breaks:

Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the "Chronic Offenders" category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company's mental health policy.

Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.

Thank you,

The Management

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***DK***
GAZA n GUNNER LIFETIME SUPPORTER
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dis is funny...

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I NEVER fail, i'm just SUCCESSFUL in finding out what doesn't work
Freedom is never voluntarily given by the oppressor; it must be demanded by the oppressed.

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Caramel_Delite
Super Member
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HAHAHH

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CD FI LIFEEEEEEEEEEE

Tweeta
MZ Teacha
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roro this jus nuh right...lol

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I aLwAyS tElL tHe TrUtH eVeN wHeN i'M lYiNg
yellow
Noobs
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a my work dem get it from
lol

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Msz JayBee
The Angelic One
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lollollol that was in my inbox at work

-- Edited by So_InTriCat3 at 17:18, 2008-03-13

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AJ
(**^**) AJ d FOOTBALL STAR (**^**)
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lol

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REACHIN OUT MI A MEK DEM KNO SEH A DJ DISTURBIA
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up2
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mi woulda resign

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A So Di Ting Set!!!

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Msz JayBee
The Angelic One
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oh man you missed the lunch hour rules

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bLaCkBeatZ
MZ Life Time Super G/\Z/\ Member
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maaad crazy

If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise.

* If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise.

* If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.



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princekris
**"The Prince"**
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lol wen i own ma bizniz those will b ma rules :P

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minksta
MZJA Gangsta Girl
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lol.............dont want to work for those ppl

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jr1
Breaking Out Type
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"the toilet paper roll will retract"ro

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Garrick
MZ Super Veteran
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lol

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5
GangstaGentleman
Breaking Out Type
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MAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lollollollolrofl.gifrofl.gifrofl.gifrofl.gif

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Dubito Ergo Cogito, Cogito Ergo Sum.

 


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SEX IS NOT THE ANSWER...... SEX IS THE QUESTION AND YES IS THE ANSWER
Crazypickney
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rorororo damn

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