15 Mistakes women make when having sex: (according to men)
1. BEING PASSIVE - Don't let him undress you and himself. Just help him a little bit: like making the first step. Just because we are men it doesn't mean that we must do all the job.
2. WEARING JEANS OR TIGHT PANTS - It takes time to take off these kind of clothes. Every second counts. Remember one thing:the more time yougot, the more rounds you got, and the more rounds you got the more satisfied you get.
3. GOING DOWN HALFWAY - Once you start going down, don't stop at the belly button, keep going or just don't go past the neck at all.
4. CHOCKING HIS CHICKEN - Men feel pain, we are not as tough as you think. No man has a leather dick. You got to be smooth with the dick. Pulling it too hard doesn't make us feelhorny, it hurts even though we don't tell you.
5. LICKING HIS EAR TOO MUCH - It's just the same as a dog licking a bitches ass.
6. MOANING LIKE A RUNNER THAT NEEDS AIR - Better moan with style girls cause men love to make fun of girls who can't moan like movie stars. Try not to make much noise when you exhale.
7. SCRATCHING HIS BACK - We don't need no autographs, girls. It does not feel good at all. Depend on the length of nail and how deep you dig them in our backs so keep your nails in you pockets please. If you feel the need to scratch a boys back, either grip the hell out of the sheets or the headboard.
8. LETTING YOUR HAIR FALL IN HIS FACE - Men need air, they breath.
9. JUMPING ON HIPS TO HARD - A man is not a horse so please take it easy unless you got a big booty to take care of the landing.
10. SCREAMING TO LOUD WHEN YOU CUM - Are you crazy? Do you want us to get caught by your parents? Or do you just love seeing me jump through the window butt naked.
11. KEEP YORSELF CLEAN! - Everyone knows that fish is the smell. But we don't have to be smelling it when you take your panties off. Please warn us if you haven't freshened up. And nobody wants to suck on salty dirty titties. Men aren't the only ones who sweat. And we sure don't want you smellin like you work at a fish market either. Make sure your ass is clean!!! No man wants to eat off a dirty plate.
12. MAKE SURE YOUR FEET ARE IN CHECK - Every man has a certain turn on, everything on a woman must be perfect, thats how we like it. Do not, I repeat do not get in bed with us with your feet looking like you were walking bare foot on toxic waste. You know what i am talkin about, nail polish coming off halfway, smelly as hell, uneven toenails, soles feeling like sandpaper. Its hard to perform good foreplay with that. And don't even think about asking us to suck your toes when they look like they have been beaten with a sledge hammer(ugly)and we are not to fonder of unpolished toes either. We like them soft,pretty, and tasty looking.
13. GIVING HEAD - Don't use your teeth!
14. AFTER SEX BROADCASTING - Don't go bragging to your friends saying that you have us so called "whipped" its not cool at all, especially when his friends are around. If a man is "whipped" he won't admit it.
15. KEEP IT REAL - When you're at the point of breakin up, don't wait until then to tell us we didn't knock it right.
10. SCREAMING TO LOUD WHEN YOU CUM - Are you crazy? Do you want us to get caught by your parents? Or do you just love seeing me jump through the window butt naked.
If there's no need to keep your voice low... scream as loud as you want :) Just not directly into the ear.
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