Dear Pastor,

I am a 26-year-old woman. I'm in a situation I don't understand. I was brought up in a Christian home with a single parent, my mother. However I met my father when I was seven years old. When I met him I found out he was a Rastafarian. He would take me to visit the 12 tribes, of which he was a member. My father died shortly after and only left me with memories of him being a Rasta that left me always have a liking for Rastafarians.

When I grew up I found myself starting to be attracted to Rastas, as I thought they would share the same belief and moral convictions just as my father. That's how I started my first relationship with a Rasta man. After I got to know him I was told by him that I would have to sleep with his friends and also his brother. I didn't know what to do as I was very ignorant to everything, just returning from abroad, where I spent most of my teenage life, and had no friends to enlighten me on what Rastas believe. So I kept on seeing the guy thinking he was just making fun, until they all started to come on to me, one by one.

One day I went shopping and met another Rastafarian. As I was very unhappy and lonely I decided to exchange numbers, that's how I started dating Rasta number two. Everything was cool until one night we were in his room having sex and one of his so-called friends asked to join us. I told him no, that I wasn't into those things. However, he got up to use the bathroom and he returned with his friend who was not a Rasta. The Rasta guy whom I was seeing held me down on the bed while he called his friend to have sex with me. I cried and begged them not to do it, but they never cared how I was feeling or what I was saying as they continued to do it. After his friend was finished, he came on me and finished it off.

Pastor, I really don't know what to do anymore, as it has been very hard for me. Ever since all that happened I tried to move on, but I can't, all I do is stay at home and cry. Please help me, as the memories sometimes cause me to think suicidal thoughts. Please help me, I don't know what to do and I am too embarrassed to start life over.

T., Jamaica.

Dear T.,

The experience you have written about would make my readers who respect women feel very sad. The first Rastaman who told you that you would have to sleep with other Rastas didn't care much about you, he allowed his brethren to sexually abuse you and he took pleasure in doing so. They messed up your mind.

Unfortunately, the second Rastaman you became involved with was no better, he too behaved like a beast.

Thank God not all Rastas abuse women. I suggest that you call a family counsellor and make an appointment to see him or her. You need to go through therapy.