He said, "I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it." 
She said, "You wear pants don't you?"

He said, "Shall we try swapping positions tonight?" 
She said, "That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!"

He said, "What have you been doing with the grocery money I gave you?" 
She said, "Turn sideways and look in the mirror."

He said, "Why don't women blink during foreplay?" 
She said, "Thay don't have time."

He said, "How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?" 
She said, "We don't know; it's never been done."

He said, "Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?" 
She said, "They already have boyfriends."

He said, "Why are MARRIED women heavier than SINGLE women?" 
She said, "Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.  Married women come home, see what's in the fridge, and go to the fridge."